Hun I wish I could bestow on you some if the wise words and wonderful support you have provided to me and others in the past. What I will say is that when things all feel overwhelming, try to block out the big picture and just look at the now.

The now

* your boy is home
* you are breastfeeding him even though he was born prem (that in itself is a huge achievement in itself.
* you have the most amazing knowledge about all things bf so you are way ahead of most of us to begin with.

Just focus on the now babe, try not to torture yourself with the what ifs because if you break it up into day by day it isn't going to seem so daunting, tomorrow is a new day.

I think you are amazing !!!!