Just wanted to throw in another positive c/s experience. I've had two, one under GA & one with just a spinal. Both were great. While I know I could have done lots of mental preparation for a vaginal birth and possibly had a great experience with it, I also know myself and what I'm like, and I think the only way I would have coped with the experience well would be if I could have birthed in a dark room by myself, which we all know is a very difficult to achieve (unless you have a really great, trusted, idependent midwife who can help you achieve a hands off homebirth, and you have the $$$ to pay for it, and nothing goes wrong requiring a transfer). The emotional side of things aside, I'm happy that my perineum remained in tact and everything is still the same 'down there'. I have no regrets, no BFing or bonding problems (breastfed my first for 2 years), and little pain beyond the first couple of days... and even that wasn't bad because they give you strong pain relief.
Many people do have quite a hard time with cesareans, so it's worth reading many different people's experiences so you know what it can be like. I think for many, part of the reason that it is so traumatic is because they feel disempowered by the experience and/or really wanted a vaginal birth. If a cesarean is what you want and choose, and you know what to expect so that the pain or some other aspect of it doesn't take you by surprise, then I don't think you are likely to be traumatised by it. For me, I think I would have been the opposite- if I had been forced or coerced into a vaginal birthing experience it when I wasn't emotionally/mentally prepared for it or wasn't able to do it on my terms I would have found *that* traumatic and been angry/p***ed off about the experience.
Moral of the story is, do whatever you feel most comfortable with. You know yourself best, and what's right for you.g Reading about the range of people's experiences will help you understand what you're in for, either way.
Goodluck with whatever you decide.
Last edited by skeetaboat; November 13th, 2009 at 12:30 PM.
: spelling
Like everyone else has said.... research research research! It is important to be informed and to do what is best both for you and your baby.
I recently had my first baby via emergency c-section and my feelings about this are mixed. On a positive note, the actual procedure was fine. The doctors/nurses were fantastic and extremely supportive, DH was allowed into the operating room and when he almost passed out the nurses happily took the camera to be sure they got first pics of DD for me. Before having the operation they were great too, gently explaining that my baby was distressed but that everything would be ok however the baby had to be born now and the only way for that to happen was via a c-section. I felt fine with this at the time as all I wanted was for my baby to be safe and well.The procedure itself was over in no time and after a quick cuddle with my baby DH did some bonding with DD while I was in recovery. Once reunited with DD I was instantly in love with her and have no problems whatsoever with bonding or BF. Also, physically I have coped very well and was quickly up & about again. So in that respect it was a very positive experience. Emotionally however, I am still trying to come to terms with the experience. I feel like my body failed me and I that I have missed out on the precious exerience of birthing my baby naturally. This is something that I very much wanted - I also really didn't want to have a c-section.
From my experience I think it has a lot to do with your frame of mind and your expectations. I didn't expect to have a c-section and i definitely didn't want to have one hence my disappointment. I think if I had known it was coming I would have been more prepared for it and I would not have such negative feelings about it. Be informed and be prepared and I'm sure whatever path you chose will be the right one for you.
I think maybe you need to have a really good think about what brought you to make that decision in the first place. It's so hard when you've not had a baby yet to know what the *right* or best thing to do is, let alone when you have well-meaning friends and family members adding their two cents. Some women have had family members that all had to have a c/s, so they think that they will also have trouble. Some think that because they are only petite that they will struggle to get a baby out, some are afraid of doing damage to their vagina/pelvic floor and others have had trauma that makes them not want to give birth vaginally. The wife of one of DH's friends had also made the decision to have a c/s birth as soon as she was old enough to even really think about birth. This was based on her small frame and also that her father was a 13lb baby and the thought of that terrified her. Im' not close to her to have really talked about her feelings, but I do know that when she eventually gave birth, that it was vaginally and I got the impression that she was glad that she did instead of going straight for a c/s.
I guess once you have identified the reason/s why you want to birth like this then maybe they are something you can work on so you know you are having the right birth for you.
I'm coming on board a bit late with this but just wanted to share my c/s experience. TBH I was scared of VB but I was determined to give it a go and read heaps about VB. Then my baby was in breech and I decided the risk to her with a VB was too great for me to take. So I did have an elective c/s.
Anyway, my c/s experience was a very unpleasant one. As soon as my c/s was over I started vomiting and I continued vomiting non-stop for 12 hours. I couldn't get out of bed, I couldn't even sit up, I couldn't eat, I couldn't sleep and worst of all I couldn't hold my new baby girl whom I was dying to look at, touch and cuddle. I was extremely exhausted and felt so rotten and I was in a lot of pain. It took me two days to recover. I finally got out of bed on day 3 but was so weak and sick still. After that I was still feeling unwell and weak for a long time and of course had to recover from the surgery too. I'm not sure how common that scenario is but I have since met another mother who went through the exact same thing as me so I don't think it's uncommon.
With VB one friend of mine didn't even realise she was in labour until a check up, then had one hour of pain and that's it. While another friend of mine had a very long hard labour with baby #1 and chose c/s for baby #2, which she found easier.
As others have said I think research is the key. Way up pros and cons of both options before you make a decision.
Like the other ladies have said it is your body, your baby, your birth, your choice... so please don't let yourself be swayed by other peoples opinions. Knowledge is power and will help you feel confident in your decision.
I also want to stress that everyones experience is different. Some people have had hideous VB's while others have had ones that are magical, similarly some people have had terrible CS's and awful recoveries, while others have relished the experience and recovered quite easily. So I suppose what I am saying is just because you read about one bad experience (be it a bad CS or a bad VB) don't let that make your mind up.
Research the techniques, quiz your OB, find out everything you need to know to make a decision that you're comfortable with. Then make a clear birth plan (whichever way you go) and make sure that your OB and midwives know exactly what YOU want.
And for what it is worth I had an emergency CS and I remember DS's birth as being magical. I cried when they lifted him out and I was able to hold him within about 2 minutes of him being born and held him the whole time they stitched me up. While I was in recovery (was only 30 minutes) DH went with him to be weighed and checked out. For the record, they didn't cut through my stomach muscles (I've heard that it is pretty unusual for them to cut them these days, but ask your OB), but rather pulled them out of the way. Yes for the next couple of days I wasn't in great shape, but was up and able to have a shower etc the next day. I was strong enough to cuddle DS from the minute we went to our room and I think I was even changing nappies the next day. The good thing about having had him in a private hospital is that you have 6 days there to recover and you can also have your partner stay with you. I really liked that while I wasn't able to do everything, DH was doing it instead (not a midwife). I had no problems bonding with DS and no issues with my milk coming through.
Good Luck with the rest of your pregnancy and your birth (whichever way you choose to go).
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