Thanks OP, I am looking forward to having the discussion with our Obs on Thursday and yes it is right me us, DH and I both feel incredible peace about it. We even started talking about names again last night which we had completely forgotten about because we were both so pre-occupied with the birth. It made us realise that we were both feeling overwhelmed by the pressure of feeling like we had to go through with a vaginal birth that we both started to think, what were we thinking. Now we are thinking and talking about how much we are looking forward to bump arriving safely and getting our heads back into the right place where we are enjoying it again.
Salsa, I am certainly not going to be disappointed if Dr says nope lets keep him in there a week or so longer. I/we certainly did not make this decision based on a time frame, we came to this decision because we feel that its best for us and our baby. So if he comes a week later than so be it as long as he has the BEST chance he has got to be delivered safely and with as little distress as possible than that is all that matters to me.
But there is also nothing wrong with having a preference if everything is ok. I will be asking Dr for another growth scan anyway. The last report was good as they measured his head, abdo and length of his legs. They also measure the amount of amniotic fluid he has and all in all at that stage he was growing very, very well. Other than slightly enlarged kidneys he is perfect! I know these reports are a guess but they are an educated guess. I am certainly not relying on them and we are only using them to be informed. After all nothing in this world is certain and we are not silly enough to think that having a baby is a certain science. Its all in the hands of God and we can try and guess as much as we want in the end though its his miracle.
Puppies just wanted to wish you all the best. Well done on making the decision that is right for you and I'll look forward to hearing the birth announcement! Take care xxxx
Wow, I had no idea women who elected for a c-section were bullied by other women, (especially since cs are increasingly common).
I am at the other end of the scale (wanting a home birth) so I have some idea of the types of stuff 'concerned' people carry on with (such as "do you know anything about birth?" which one MAN said to me!)
As many other wise BBers have posted - you can only do what is right for you - and vital to that decision is both research and instinct (and you seem to be using both!)
I have also been following some of your posts, so my only advice would be to confront some of those fears you were having about a vaginal birth (I don't mean so you can have one), but rather, fears often help us see something we didn't know about ourselves...perhaps you need some re-assurance about the capabilities of your body, or some positive affirmations about what you can achieve.
I agree you shouldn't try for a vaginal birth to prove something, (or out of pride), but you deserve to feel good about your body and its amazing ability to perform miracles (hello, you're growing a baby!)
Go for your CS, and feel empowered in doing so, just don't ignore any underlying anxieties...they always seem to come back again....and again...and again!
Anna,
Fears, yes they are something that I need to face but I will not use the birth of my precious son as a way of facing them. I am just not willing to take the risk. Bringing him safely into this world peacefully and without distress is far more important to me than anything. I am not scared of pain, I am not scared of labour. I am scared of hurting him or causing him harm and that is the main reason for my decision. I am sure that as the years go by I will be forced to face my fears which are "My darling son getting hurt in anyway" but that will happen I am sure and I don't look forward to that at all.
If the only reason I would attempt to have a vaginal birth was to face my fears then I believe that I would be selfish. I would end up emotionally distraught if my instincts turned out right and we only ended up in theatre with a distressed baby. Knowing that if I had just followed my instincts and did the elective then non of this distress would have happened. Then I would feel guilt and disappointment in myself that I made the wrong decision. I guess it could also go the other way to but in my heart I don't feel that. After all your instincts as a mother kick in and if I start ignoring them now then what hope have I got for being a good mother.
Puppies, I agree a VB is not the place for you to face these fears. Indeed that's exactly what I was saying. I think a CS is the best option for you if thats what you want.
I was more concerned that you have anxiety at all. I know how debilitating it is. That's all I was getting at...
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