Thanks girls for your suggestions. It definitely helps to get different perspectives and I need to try and come to terms with what may happen before it actually happens IYKWIM. It's just the way I am, and after taking over 4 years to get to the point of having our baby I have been having trouble dealing with the fact that once again I have no control over anything.

Leasha, I have spoken to an ABA counsellor about expressing, so it is definitely something I am going to try in a couple of weeks. When I mentioned it to the midwife however, she was horrified that I would be expressing before giving birth. I had it on my birth plan and her words were "well NO, you WON'T be expressing before birth". I told her about the information I had been given from the ABA and she didn't say anything more. I have an electric pump so will give it a go soon. I just hope I can get some! I've had no leaking or sign of colostrum so far. The point you made about PND is something I am concerned about as well since I already have risk factors due to LTTTC/IVF etc. I feel depressed just thinking about it now, and need to get my head around it beforehand and try to make the best of a not so ideal situation.

DD, I have been discussing the grandparent thing with DH today. He actually suggested we wouldn't tell his mother until after he is born and we are ready for visitors (she only lives 5mins from the hospital and will be banging down the door despite our requests, because she's already said she has to be the first to see him). As for my mum, she's a couple of hours away so if she promises to respect our wishes and just stay at our house until DH calls her, I will let her know when we are going in. No one else will know - because another reason is I won't get any peace and quiet the night before because of phone calls!!

I'm going to relax for the weekend and then think about it a bit more when we know what we're dealing with after Monday's ultrasound. I just have to chill out and try and let go of some of these control issues I have!!