Yep me again with childcare issues!
If you are bored of my posts please dont read on - im sorry.

DD has been back in day care 1 day a week - this is week 3

Week 1 - they said she cried the first 2 hours straight and had to be rocked in a pram until lunch time, only slept out of pure exhaustion @ 1pm for 1 hr.

Week 2 - as soon as i left they said she cried and wouldnt stay outside(she loves palying outdoors) and still only slept after 1 hour of rocking for 1.5hrs in the afternoon. When i went to pick her up she was crying non-stop (before she saw i was there).

Week 3 (TODAY) - i said good bye and she starting crying again. I hung around to talk to admin (as i decided that perhaps she isnt ready for care and gave 2 weeks notice to pull her out) - this took me 1/2 hr... i walked back to get my pram and could hear her from inside (she was outside).. screaming in tears ma ma ma ma.

I burst into tear and left before they saw me cause i am so embarressed i am not handling it like every other mum seems to,

What the hell am i doing? Am i paying someone $60 a day so that i can make my daughter cry non -stop and think that i dont love her? She isnt enjoying it from what i can tell (i mean sure she probably has moment of new discoveries and fun) but its so hard to watch her cry.

Especially when i am at home and could have her here with me.

I put her in cause i thought it was the right thing to do to get her socialised with children her own age but she cries when one comes near her and has started hitting my friends children (and she had to learn this somewhere).

I am only letting her have a half day today as she is comoing down with a cold and i need her to have a decent sleep - so i am getting her in about 3 hrs.

I just feel so bad.

Sorry for the vent