Hi Natalia,

I can really sense a lonliness in you... Splitting up with your partner is an awful and heartbreaking experience for anyone. But don't be so down on yourself that you'll never find another partner or have a relationship or start a family. University can open up so many doors, and connect you with like-minded people you never knew existed. All is not lost :hugs:

It also seems like maybe you do want a child to fill that lonliness you feel... so you can look at this little person and know you'll never be alone or without love because you have this child... If your desire to have a baby is very strong, then you'll understand the importance of making sure you are in the right place, emotionally, to raise a child. It's true, you can't love and look after someone else properly unless you can love and look after yourself. It does sound to me like you have some trust/intimacy issues. Have you thought about seeing a counsellor and working through them?

I have PCOS... it doesn't mean you won't be able to conceive... it just means that its a bit more complicated, and you'll probably need some help. PCOS is pretty common, but I understand your fear... I cried my eyes out when I got the diagnosis, but calmed down a lot after talking to many many people who conceived, some naturally and some with the help of medication and drs.

Have you considered being a respite carer? It's a few steps below being a foster carer, and so so so important. My bro has CP and his weekend repsite carers were mostly uni students in their mid 20's studying things like human services, social work, and psychology. Respite carers are so important to both the children and the families, and you have the opportunity to give a child experiences they might not have had otherwise. My bro's respite carer used to take him to museums and the movies and art gallerys and musicals and all of those cultural things that were also very difficult for us to take him to.

I would wait until you are in a happy, love-filled relationship (yes, they do exist) to bring a child into this world. Through the 6 months of fertility treatment last year, and 4 months of TTC, I know for a fact I could not have done it without the support of my partner. These first few months pf pregnancy have been pretty tough with morning sickness and exhaustion, and I couldn't have survivied that without my partner beside me... I couldn't imagine raising a child by myself.

Thats not to say that it can't be done, there any so many single mothers who do a wonderful fantastic job, but I'm sure for the majority of people it wouldn't be the first option.

Yes, it can be hard to hear people's negative comments about your desire to start a family. But remember that its your desire and they don't have to share it. I have had negative comments, I am still getting them now, from people very close to me, so I know that its hard, but just remember that its your dream and your desire and their opinions don't have to mean anything to you. I can also understand your housemates views... having a child in the house is a huge change for everyone. Everyone has to change their lifestyles... a baby crying in the middle of the night can be annoying for housemates who really don't want to hear it... and the house needs to be baby proofed... and your friends mum (even though she wanted more children than she had) might have he own issues and not want a baby around, or she could just be moving on from that dream, and ready to live another stage in her life without a child around. Personally, I think raising a child would be easier done away from a share house, then you can set your own house rules, and live in a way that suits you and your baby, rather than having to work around housemates.

Congrats on getting into uni... do you have to study part time because of work/money? Student services at the uni can help with working out Centrelink with you, and probably could help you get another one or two subjects in your semester? There is also summer semester which might be an option?
No, you don't have to be educated to be a good mother. I don't think anyone on this site would ever say that. Of course, having a uni degree would definately help financially, when it comes round to working and supporting your family (whenever you choose to do that). I don't think anyone could argue that.

I hope that you are able to get some help working through the emotional hurt that you have. Your uni will have a counsellor which you would be able to talk to if you wish. Take care :hugs: