MIL hoping for pregnancy news soon....

[Shanti]

Hi girls,

Today DH and I met up with his parents for lunch and we had a really great time.. I get on really well with my in-laws so i'm very blessed.... and especially MIL. We are both pretty close and always have a great laugh!

Anyway, when we met up with them, we were walking through the shops and we'd just been to the newsagency and MIL said, out of the blue, "I was looking at my star signs today & it said; there will be news of a pregnancy" and I looked at her and she had a big grin and cheeky smirk on her face! I was already talking to my FIL at the time and I was trying to avoid the look on her face so I didn't have to respond! Then she repeated what she said! DH just looked at me lol and I looked at MIL and I said to her "hahaha! Does that mean YOU"RE pregnant again? well congratulations then!!! There is a huge age difference but I'm sure you'll get past that...." and we all just had a big laugh....

MIL really wants to be a grandmother (I don't blame her because her oldest son (DH's brother) doesn't want kids!!!!) and I want more than anything to be able to give that to her, and US first and foremost, a child!! lol but I'm afraid we can't argue with nature and we are just waiting our turn! Hopefully we're next.....
They would know we are ttc because we told them about a year ago that after the wedding we'd give it a go and they know how much I want to be a mother and how much DH wants to be a father. Soooo they're just waiting for the big news!

We got married end of Sept recently and so it's been a few months since then and every time we meet up with them I can't help but feel like they are waiting for us to 'announce' some big news but unfortunately we don't have any big news to announce....

Does anyone else feel this way with their parents? It's not a bad thing or a good thing, it's just a 'normal' thing.... just interested to hear if anyone else feels this? Like they really wish they had some exciting news of a pregnancy but they aren't pregnant yet? And we won't say to them "we're ttc" because I'm a 'private' person and don't say that stuff! however they would just know anyway....

BTW!! Funny thing is, I read her star signs today out of the paper where she reckons she read it, and there was nothing about a PREGNANCY in there!! so she was just saying it to hopefully get it out of us... maybe she was hoping we'd finally tell her we're pregnant but we don't have any news to tell her as we're not pregnant lol she is such a cheeky little thing!

[Visitor7]

It sure does sound like she wants to be a grandmother, which is great.
When we were TTC with Nina my parents knew we were. And every time we saw them, she'd give me this look as if to say 'well, are you?' without actually saying anything. When I did fall pg, Heath (DH) said to my mum 'what do you reckon about being a grandmother' and she didn't get it at first that he was announcing that we were pregnant! Once is sunk in she was estatic.
Just think when you do announce your pregnancy (and you will soon I'm sure of it) how estatic she's going to be!

[Rumpleteaser]

She was probably hoping to see some tell tale sign on you face when she said it, thinking you may be keeping quiet. I think when it happens, you will be so excieted that as soon as you are happy with your BT levels you will probably tell your families. Good luck for this month.

[Shanti]

Charlotte - yep! that's what i thought too! tee hee.... yeah i think we will tell them as soon as we are utd and confirmed with BT! Thanks!

Jodi - lol that's funny what your DH said to your mother lol i bet she was stoked!!!

[TreeTops]

Aw Ren it must be hard having pressure from family when you're already trying without luck, especially so soon after AF arriving this month.

I told my mum and sister last year that we were going to start in Jan. My sister posted on my facebook wall a couple of weeks ago saying "have you got any news for me?????????????" I emailed my mum yesterday that I was making banana bread, and she replied that bananas are good for "expectant mums".

I've already told them that once we have news I will tell them. I'm not going to wait until I'm 12 weeks with them, but they still ask.

Oh, just seen your sig - If we have any luck this cycle then our bubs will be due 10 days before DH's birthday

[Shanti]

Treetops - yeah it is a bit sad when you just get AF and know you have another 4wks until you can test again.... its such a very long time
You sound like you are getting the same thing in your life! lol its not a bad thing i guess people are just excited and want good news and i think ppl forget that it doesnt always happen straight away for some people....

I am seeing my sister in a couple of weeks and she has a 5mth old (shes 30) and fell first cycle and i just am anxious that she might say to me 'sooo, any exciting news for us?' or 'are you pregnant yet?' cos she says things how they are and says them outright so yeah i just don't know how to respond when people suddenly throw a 'sensitive' question in my face like that.....

I'm getting pretty good at just smiling and saying 'we're just enjoying life for what we have right now and whatever will be will be' even though deep down inside i am saying 'oh man, i want more than anything to be pregnant right now but hey $hit happens and i'm not one of the lucky ones that falls pregnant in 1 cycle!'

[briggsy's girl]

Ren - my mum was like this with my SIL - she'd ask all the time if SIL was pg - poor SIL was getting really stressed about it as it took them 9 months to fall pg with number one - then they announced their pg through their christmas cards - and mum was "too busy" to open hers for a while!

mum started the same stuff with us - and as much as i didn't want to tell them about the AC stuff, she pushed me too far one day so i told her bluntly that it wasn't happening and that she had better not question me again - i'd tell her when i was good and ready. it wasn't what i wanted to do - but i needed to get her to back off.

it's obviously different with your IL's as you have a good relationship with them - but don't let yourself feel pressured - if it's constantly being mentioned i'd just have a quiet word with your MIL and let her know that you're taking a while - maybe even mention your angel baby to let her know that this is a genuine struggle for you and that constant reminders can be painful...

[Shanti]

Thanks BG... I liked what you said at the end... I think if I am still getting the 'looks' and the comments after 2 more months, I think I will have to say something gentle like that to her.... mind you, she actually took nearly 2yrs to conceive their first son (DH's older brother) and she told me that a couple of yrs ago and i remember her saying that, so I'm sure she'd feel very supportive and be understanding aswell.... & she would know it doesn't always happen straight away!! Although before we got married she would say to me 'i reckon you'll be pregnant straight after the wedding!" and so i thought "yeah probably" haha WRONG!
My Mum doesn't mention anything, although I told her recently as she knows we're ttc, I told her I've been getting frustrated and upset about it and worrying something could be wrong and she said that it took her up to 8mths to conceive 2 of her 3 girls but I don't remember her ever telling me that, i remember her once saying it only took her 3mths or so so i think she's just trying to be nice there.....

ah *sighs* this ttc journey isn't quite as easy as I imagined it would be.....

[briggsy's girl]

it would be fantastic if it were as easy as the sex-ed teachers at school try to make you believe!!

both my brother and I were "oops" babies - from what i gather, my mum's siblings (all 13 of them) weren't really planned - and i KNOW both my nan and her sister were oops babies (my great nan was only 14 when she had nan...) - on dad's side, my nan told me she'd never had problems and none of my female cousins have - so it's making it a lot harder accepting that i'm having problems! the rest of my family get utd at the drop of a hat! i can certainly understand your frustrations

[Shanti]

Yeah BG that would make it even harder for you knowing your family members fell pregnant 'too' easily

funny you mention that, because i found out a few months ago, that not only did my sister fall pregnant first go, and she wasnt even really hoping she was just 'ah whatever happens' attitude, and then my aunty told me that she fell pregnant pretty much the night of her wedding (well, that was OUR plan too....we got married sept just gone) and my Grandma fell pregnant within 2-3mths with my Dad and I think someone else in the family fell pregnant pretty fast..... ALSO to add salt to the wounds, Mum told me a few months ago this was before we started ttc, that my sister had a 5hr labour, and so did my Grandma and my mum had short labours and so did someone else in the family so again, i'll probably no doubt, get the LOOOONGEST labour haha..... i shouldnt say that but yeah that'd be right if it happens that way hey!! lol

ah well *sighs again* we just gotta keep going don't we.... otherwise we may aswell just curl up in a ball.

[briggsy's girl]

ah well *sighs again* we just gotta keep going don't we.... otherwise we may aswell just curl up in a ball.

what? you're not already curled up in a ball? i been there for ages now

[Shanti]

BG my journey hasn't been as long as your's... :hugs: I do hope this is your year.... no, this is your MONTH for your long awaited well deserved BFP.

I do have to admit though, the last 5mths have felt like about a year.... a month normally flies by but when you're ttc, it doesn't hey....

and as for those teachers at school telling us how easy it is to fall pregnant, perhaps they forgot to mention the REAL facts about how long it can take for the average woman.... ggggrrr! Here I was thinking I only had to dtd once!!!!! lol all these years of being on the pill, I could have saved some $$$ lol (joking by the way)

[TreeTops]

Yeah BG that would make it even harder for you knowing your family members fell pregnant 'too' easily

Oh yeah, then there's that! My mum had three of us, and we were all unplanned.

For years my mum complained that my younger brother was conceived while she was using her partner's advice of timing unprotected sex according to her cycles. So I had it in my head that my mum was charting temps and CM to avoid pregnancy. The other day she told me that all she was doing was recording when her period was in her diary!! Silly, silly behaviour when she actually left her partner before finding out she was pregnant....she ended up getting married to him when she was 8 months.

My BIL's wife conceived her first straight after coming off the pill, which to begin with my MIL was pleased to discuss, but then when BIL and SIL were unfortunate to miscarry at 11 weeks my MIL told me she'd heard that becoming pregnant straight after coming off the pill could cause miscarriage. I soon corrected her that there was no proof to suggest that (none that I've seen anyway), and that all sorts of things can cause miscarriage. As it happened they did tests and determined that it was Turners.

Anyway, I digress. Yes, Ren it sounds like you have a good relationship with your MIL, and that it might be a good idea to 'share' with her if you're still unlucky in a couple of months.

[Heaven]

Oh God, IKWYM. My mum knows we are TTC and have been since July last year. She knows I will tell her as soon as I find out. So why does she have to ask every time I speak to her 'so, are you pregnant yet' and then when I say no 'sigh'. Well, I'm sorry!! I'm trying!!!! She was pregnant with me 6 weeks after coming off the pill. Doesn't mean it's that easy for everyone!!!!

[Shanti]

ah girls! I'm so glad you girls feel the pressure too!! lol

like Sara said, they should just know that we will tell them as soon as we have news ourselves!!!! of course we will them when we're ready lol

[Muppity]

Me too me too! It is almost stifling!

I live 3 hours from MiL and I will get DH to tell them over the phone because at least that way I will have 3 hours before I have her moving into the house

[meow]

It'll be very exciting when you do get to share the news

We had almost the opposite- my MIL and my Dad have never asked or seemed to wonder if and when we were going to do anything. It certainly takes any pressure off at least.

I was 31, married for over 2 years and had been with my H for 11 years when I got pregnant- surely it wouldn't seem a big surprise then huh? Nope- my Dad was stunned! My MIL was instantly excited but she didn't seem like it was something she had given any thought to happening either!

[slyder]

I thought your response to her was absolutely mint.