Sorry, I just wanted to add something that I think is relevant and apologies that it's about me again it's just that I find it easier to talk about these questions by giving real-life examples.

Regarding the single, mid-thirties, childless but wanting a family scenario that I described above. Like I said, after a few years basically panicking that the prospect looked bleak, I reached a point of acceptance. I had friends who were 100% negative about their prospects and to me that looked as if they'd given up and they weren't putting out "I'd be a great girlfriend" vibes. Defeat bred defeat. I also had friends who were very upbeat and very positive about their chances of meeting someone. BUT WHO DID NOTHING ABOUT IT EXCEPT SIT ON THE COUCH, SECURE IN THE BELIEF THAT IT WOULD HAPPEN IN TIME. They were STILL positive at 40 years old (at least in conversation, I have no idea if those were their true feelings) but still doing very little to actively find a partner. To me, neither of those approaches were particularly wise.