Preventing the early sexualisation of our children

[Maruschke]

I've been fortunate to have some professional involvement with some groups who are active in this area, and it's made me proud to have made some small difference. I did a Youtube campaign video two years ago that I was very proud of.

For my own girls, we talk a lot about the images that we see around the place and discuss some of the inappropriate stuff they question me about. I try my hardest to avoid products and media that over-sexualise children, and I try to instil in them a really healthy and age appropriate understanding of human sexuality.

I fail a lot in giving a good example about having a healthy body image, but I am trying harder to work on that.

Hun if you feel comfortable, can you give us the youtube link? Or just the title?

[Toomanytoomany]

I'll have to pm you, once I've emptied my inbox as I'm at the limit!!

The production quality's not great (my first attempt) but the sentiment is sound.

[Bathsheba]

I have a 14yo DD and she actually makes me feel quite proud of her attitudes on this subject. Even though she was given Barbie and Bratz dolls as a child she doesn't seem to have grown up with the unhealthy ideas they seem to promote. She has never dressed inappropriately, infact she is quite modest in her choice of clothes.

I put it down to me me being fairly modest and actually saying that something is inappropriate when it clearly is. Scantily clad women and men, unless they are on the beach, make me feel uncomfortable. You don't do the shopping in a bikini top with trackies around your hips and the top of your g-string showing... you just don't. It's got nothing to do with feeling comfortable in your own body it's about appropriateness. These days I don't usually have to say anything... my DD will get in before me and say something to me under her breath like "hello... you don't dress like that while doing the shopping" LOL Now having said that if my DD wanted to sunbake with only a g-string on a beach in the south of France and every other woman was doing it then fine... but I think that people have become so protective of their perceived 'rights' that they have forgotten to consider whether something is appropriate or not. Say the word "appropriate" these days and you might as well say you are a wet blanket as far as most people are concerned

I'm not loud and outspoken when I tell my children that I think something is inappropriate I just quietly share my thoughts between them and myself. DH does the same. We hug and show affection infront of the children too... because it's an example of a healthy relationship but we don't shove it down their throats.

"Dignity" is the word that springs to mind... these days you'd think it was a dirty word. But it's what we role model and so far we are happy that our children are growing up with this value. The early sexualisation of children and the huge commercial monster sex has become in our society is basically a stripping down of people's dignity. I could go on about what that means, who benefits etc but that's probably a topic for another thread.

[bon]

I hate Bratz dolls...I think they are ugly and wear completely innappropriate clothing, considering they are marketed to little girls as an alternative to Barbie. Barbie I don't have so much of a problem with - she seems to be a lot more wholesome than those skanky looking Bratz things. But of course I know that as an adult I am looking at them with different eyes than my 4 year old daughter, who recently pointed out the Bratz dolls in the toy sale catalogue and told me thats what she wants for christmas. I see a skanky looking skantily clad doll that is sending all the wrong messages to little girls, she just sees a pretty doll to play with. I mumbled something non-committal and am hoping she will forget about it. Of course if she is given one as a gift I won't stop her playing with it, but I just can't shake the dislike I have for them!

I have read articles before about how the whole Disney princess thing is unhealthy for girls because it sends them the message that all they have to do is be pretty and helpless and a handsome prince will come and 'save' them and 'complete' them and make their life perfect forever more. I don't really buy into that - I think if anything, it is those romantic comedies where the single woman has her crap life made perfect by finding mr wonderful that are more damaging. The princesses are at least obviously make-believe.

[Rouge]

I'm another proud parent over here. We have very open lines of communication and have quite extensive conversations about appropriateness, strength of women, drugs, alcohol, politics, environmental issues, animal cruelty... you name it! I think being open with your views without being forceful or nagging is the best way IMO. Yes you can protect them from some of it, and we do our very best to do that, but I would rather educate them on the appropriateness rather than ban things altogether due to the simple fact that they are going to be subject to it and there is a higher chance of it being a novelty later if its not dealt with now.

[Bengal]

Long after Bratz and Barbie dolls are gone, your DD and DS will follow suit in your train of thoughts, on what is appropriate, what outfit a bratz or barbie doll has on, is not going to contribute to who they are as a young lady, or young man.

It is the values you instil in them, and the openess, communication and relationships at home that maketh the man or woman.

Your relationship with your children is the most important thing

[bon]

Long after Bratz and Barbie dolls are gone, your DD and DS will follow suit in your train of thoughts, on what is appropriate, what outfit a bratz or barbie doll has on, is not going to contribute to who they are as a young lady, or young man.

That may be true but I still dislike Bratz dolls. I can't help it - although I am fully aware, like I said before, that my DD doesn't look at them in the same way - I see a toy that is representative of this early sexualisation of children, little girls especially, whereas she just sees a pretty doll to play with. So, while I am reluctant to buy one for her, I am not going to ban them - if she is given one, she will be able to play with it. She prefers other toys atm anyway, so it's a bit of a non-issue really.