My brother and I are 18 months apart. My sisters are about the same. There is 6-8 years between me and my sisters.

It's not the gaps that create the problems, but the lack of family. Create the environment where everyone is included in the family unit, even when grown up. Reinforce it whenever you can and however.

My partner tells me time and time again how unique that we are all great mates and a very bounded family. It's not unachievable.

As for the family or Uni decision, it's what is right for you, selfish isn't apart of it. I guess worrying about being an older dad can be concerning, but hey I'm going to be first timer at 40 so it can't be all that bad!

Midwifery isn't a game and having to chance to focus your abilities on your studies is paramount. So perhaps letting that dream come to fruition will also give you the life skills to help juggle a precious addition once you qualify!