I am the youngest of 6. Mum had 7 babies over 25 years (first at 18, last, me, at 43), but my brother was born at about 20 weeks with anencephaly and obviously he didn't make it.

My closest sibling in age is 3.5 years older than me, my closest sibling emotionally, my only sister (half sister if you want to be precise, which as a family we never do ), is 16 years older than me.

Mum nearly died having my brother, placenta praevia, abruption and emergency ceaserian delivery at 33+ weeks, massive haemorrhage, 4 units transfused. 18 months later she lost my brother with anencephaly, 21 or so months after that she had me.

I am incredibly grateful to have so many siblings. We are not all close, some are closer than others, but we are all HERE, in the world, for one another.

I had DD, an oopsie baby, in 2006. Her dad and i split up when she was 8 weeks old and i began dating DP when she was 5 months old. We've been going strong 2 years now and i am DESPERATE to have another baby. In my head i want us to have bought a house (we'll be looking in November), lived together for a good while (6-9 months, to iron out any transitional difficulties and so we both have a "normal" time to look back on should i have a difficult pregnancy) before i have the Mirena removed. Of course my uterus just wants a baby in it NOW. NOW! Lol.

When i was single and thinking of DD being an only child the idea made me feel incredibly sad. For me and for her. I would not have wanted to miss out on the joys OR the agonies of having siblings - one learns so much about one's self and the world from them (or i did anyway), and more selfishly for myself, i can see utterly the truth in Dach's words about getting a new cake (of love) with a new baby, and i WANT that. I am NOT a brilliant mother all the time, but i'm a MUCH better person for being a mother, and i am excited to see our little family grow in all the ways one can.

I don't think you have to decide now. I wouldn't have wanted 4-4.5 years between #1 and #2 (the minimum there will be IF ttc isn't problematic, which of course it might be) and in an ideal world if we have more than 1 more baby i'd want about 20-30 months between them maximum (mainly because i don't want to be BFing and changing nappies for another decade ) BUT if for whatever reason there HAS to be a big gap between #2 and #3 as well, so be it. If i hadn't had an oopsie i'd not have gotten DD, so i'm much more willing to believe that Fate knows what Fate is doing now.

On a more personal note Spice, i think you're a fabulous mumma and you should have 20 more!

Bx