You and DS are his family now, the extended family needs to respect this and take the backseat supportive role they are meant to.
Ah, that's what I forgot to say in my post!! I totally agree - my FiL was always harping on and on and on about how 'you two are your own family now, and when bub arrives it'll be just the three of you - we'll stay out of your business but we still want to be involved'...
and then when she was born it suddenly became 'WE WANNA SEE HER, WE NEVER GET TO SEE HER, YOU TWO ARE SO SELFISH AND YOU DON'T CARE ABOUT FAMILY, WHERE'S YOUR LOYALTY BLAH BLAH BLAH' and I just got sick to the gills of it...
Where was his loyalty to his family when he kicked my DH out at 16 years of age and didn't speak to him for three years?
Honestly I think his little tirades about how we were our own family and didn't need anybody interfering were just his way of having a dig at my mother, who yes can have her moments of being a royal pain but at least she has never been such a complete asshat as my FiL.
(He was just on the phone a minute ago demanding to know whether we'd completed his latest 'to do' list... Umm, DH is at work for ten hours a day and I'm at home with a baby - your stuff cna just wait, you're not going anywhere.) Ugh.