NHJ - Rang up a family lawyer and basically if i dye when bubs is born the DH-DP automatically gets custody. All I can do is have a will that the hospital are aware of that states who I want to be legal guardians and why then hope they pass the issue on to DOCS.

However the lawyer did say if he doesn't know the baby has been born and my parents (or next of kin) register the birth with "father unknown" then he has about 2 months to proove he is the father in which time my olds have custody. Not sure if they would do this but will ask in a few days (don't want to spoil my dad's birthday).

I asked one of my friends if she would be there for the birth (just incase) and she said yes so thats one less issue.

OK will get a wll kit and start organising things now for a will.

Thanks everyone for all your support and advice. At least I don't feel so much like I am making the wrong decision or that I'm an awful mum, and believe me thats how I have been feeling.