10 things breastfeeding advocates should stop saying

[BellyBelly]

Interesting that it been posted in the formula section Do you think this may foster more of the us vs them attitude? Not all breastfeeders read this forum too, myself included.

[Tinks]

Which section should it have been posted in Kelly?

I'm always getting into trouble for posting threads in the wrong area, I actually thought that since this was related to FF it should be posted here. I'd love it if you could move it to a more suitable section.

It had nothing to do with Us v them. Why is there always an us v them???

[Mad Scientist]

I hope not Kelly. I think it's just giving awareness. I think if it was posted in the bf section it would be more inflammatory to be honest even though the intent is perfectly good. It would be lovely to have a list from bf mums too.

[PumpkinZulu]

Cool, I love it! I love that the article doesn't sound defensive or argumentative...it's just laying it out there, it's saying yes, we *know* x/y/z, shoving it down our throats isn't helpful! Really, really like it!

[Mad Scientist]

Cool, I love it! I love that the article doesn't sound defensive or argumentative...it's just laying it out there, it's saying yes, we *know* x/y/z, shoving it down our throats isn't helpful! Really, really like it!

Exactly what I thought PZ!! I can't believe you're so close to meeting your baby girl! Woohoo!!

[Taurean]

Interesting that it been posted in the formula section Do you think this may foster more of the us vs them attitude?

Wouldn't it have been removed it was posted anywhere else?

I don't think it's about Us v's Them at all. I'm a BF (who has also given formula top ups) but I can still see a lot of truths in this article.

[Floweryfields]

Great article, I have heard many if not most of these said to or about others. I also don't subscribe to the owning your feelings theory - if one possibly hormonal, likely exhausted woman gets told things like this often enough, even the strongest woman will lose it!

[CrazyLady]

I felt guilty for way too long after, due to a number of reasons, being unable to BF DD. I wish I had seen this during that period of feeling like a failure, it's freaking awesome. As for the FF mums being lazy bit... FF is a huge PITA because you can't just whip your boob out and it's there. How many times I had to get up at 3am to make a bottle for DD and was being ****ed off at not being able to just whip my boob out and feed her, sucky.

[HotI]

Have you seriously heard people say and mean this?

6. ”Moms who use formula don’t love/value their babies as much as moms who breastfeed.”

Or this:

5. “Formula-feeding moms are lazy.”

And if you have read some of the breastfeeding threads, I, and many others have acknowledged that they BF cos they are disorganised, cheap and lazy (among other reasons). There are other benefits i see in bottle feeding a child, but it requires more organisation and effort but laziness?

It is so tricky to attempt to give people information and support in breastfeeding these days. You are damned if you do, damned if you don't.

I didn't find the OP as excellent as others, because i haven't heard breastfeeding advocates or others saying those statements. The ABA says Breast is normal, that breastfeeding is a learned skill... similar to the OP.

[mel_cur]

Interesting that it been posted in the formula section Do you think this may foster more of the us vs them attitude?

There IS already.

[delphmoon]

Interesting that it been posted in the formula section Do you think this may foster more of the us vs them attitude?

Interesting it is YOU that makes the comment Kelly. Where else is this post meant to go? This is a formula feeding SUPPORT group after all isn't it. I find this post empowering to the FF mother..is that such a bad thing?

For the first time I was enjoying reading through a thread relating to FF without the usual banter between FF's and others not so keen on FF and then wham- your comment. Thanks for drawing attention to the 'divide' (in a thread that was actually supportive and smooth) when you could have been supportive and said 'interesting post' or something.

Dissapointed!

[delphmoon]

Thanks Tinks for taking the time to post this. Empowering and true

[Purple Penguin]

Thanks for posting this Tinks

[delphmoon]

Great article, I have heard many if not most of these said to or about others. I also don't subscribe to the owning your feelings theory - if one possibly hormonal, likely exhausted woman gets told things like this often enough, even the strongest woman will lose it!

Couldn't agree more.

[loulabelle]

Even though I'm a Breastfeeder ( I did formular and breast for ds from 7 months though) I have had many of these things said to me in the early days of bfing my ds. I had so much trouble and so much pain. I'm a lucky one though and things got better.

I breastfeeder a toddler, I tandem feed and I guess I advocate breastfeeding, but at the same time I know well and truly the difficulties and problems so many mums go through. My sister felt such pressure to continue feeding her ds that she ended up with anxiety. Their are so many different reasons a woman can't bf or simply choose not to. I really don't understand people who make such an issue out of it. We all love our children and we all do what we feel is best for them. It really is as simple as that.

I do think mothers who ff are made to feel guilty and I don't think they should be. We carry enough guilt as mothers as it is.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk so forgive spelling mistakes

[Catastrophic]

Great post tinks :-D

Responding as a breastfeeding mum :-

Breastfeeding is soooo much easier and lazier :-D Thats why i did it for so long

[~ Mylitta ~]

Number 9 - about it coming naturally and finding it easy, I find interesting, as I hardly ever hear this said, and personally I think sometimes the impression that BF is always difficult does put some people off - when for some people (probably not the majority though) it can be easy. If you believe something is going to be difficult it often is, but also the better informed you are the better you are able to cope with the difficulties so it is a tricky one.

I'm glad you've written this. I also believe that if you think something is going to be hard it often is. I had only done a little research on breastfeeding before DS was born. I'd read the basics about attachment and positioning etc... and had information on lactation consultants just in case we had difficulties. I was determined that breastfeeding was going to come naturally and easy for both of us, and I am so grateful that this turned out to be the case for us. I've often wondered if things would have been different if I had known how hard breastfeeding could be for some people. I was amazed when I started a mother's group and found out that almost all of the mothers had had some kind of problem with breastfeeding. I'm thankful that I hadn't heard those stories beforehand and that I had a completely positive outlook for my breastfeeding.

For that reason I'm happy to share my "easy" breastfeeding journey with others. Obviously I am careful with how I word things because I'd hate to make anyone feel inadequate or guilty (because they aren't!), but I think it's good for expecting mothers to know that breastfeeding CAN come naturally and easily to some, and that it's not something to be feared. Being prepared to ask for help is wise, but if you want to prepare for the worst case scenario, then you should also prepare for the best case scenario

[Samcougar]

Tinks thankyou so much, I have been beside myself with guilt so much these last few weeks because i have been unable to supply my DD with enough breast milk to satisfy her, I now have to FF thanks again i feel a bit better about it now