I found the first appt involved a lot of listening on my part, to see how I felt about what she said.

Some of my qns now seem irrelevant. There is plenty of time to get into the nitty gritty. So just think of what is most important to you. I just checked she agreed with my reasons for HBACing and the things I didn't agree with at the hospital that I was trying to avoid.

Mostly it was about seeing if we gelled and if I felt I could trust her.

Y'know what? I thought I'd want a mother hen type who would appear calm, wise, all knowing and have so much experience that she had all the answers. My m/w was more like a girlfriend and I'm so glad. I learned to lean more on myself and trust my knowledge, with her there as a safety net and a sounding board. (she probably does have all the answers, but I didn't need that in labour anyway!)

The second m/w was at the first appt too so I got to see how they related to each other as well as us.

You are making me want to jump right back in with all these recollections!