Just wondering what age you are considered a young mum and how you ladies found it

I had DS one month before my 21st birthday so would definatley consider myself a young mum, but when i joined a young mums group in my area all the girls were under 18 and didn't really talk to me, one actually said "yer but at least you've had a chance to live your life, your getting married and buying a house" so i left that group and joined a 'normal' mums group and all the ladies were 26+ and looked at me with pity. now that im 23 and preg with my second me and DH are getting really fed up with other peoples reactions and comments. It's like it would be ok for me to be preg at this age if it was my first but because i had my first young its like ill always be put in the young mums catorgory though i was never accepted there in the first place???

just wondering if anyone else has had similar experiences??? and what ages you consider young, normal or older??? and do you go off when someone had their first or how old they are currently!