I'm so sorry you're going through all of this . I agree with n2l 100%. Counselling really does help. I have been getting couselling now for a number of years, mainly to deal with the loss of my firstborn son and then things just kept adding to that. My DF has 3 grown kids from his 1st marriage. One daughter that I don't have anything to do with, and the other 2, although I love them to death, at 20 & 24 rely so much on their dad, I feel like my needs come last. I have become quite resentful how I get treated sometimes (mainly as DF choses to have a relationship with his daughter who treats me like I'm a nothing) and as my psychologist told me, resentment kills relationships for good. Get some help hun, you will be able to work though it. Your hubby just wants his son to be happy, and he proabably feels that if he goes back to his mum, he failed somehow. Big hugs xoxox