I think she mean that her children will always be seen as "hers" whereas the new baby will be seen as theirs, and she just wants to be able to be a family where ( i know what i want to say but cant word it... grrr) She wants DH to treat her children like his own. IS that about right Vicky?? If now, please let me know...

Im sorry i cant help you, im one of the lucky ones that my son from a previous relationship gets treated like the of the kids.

I hope things work out, and good luck with your baby...