Oh Sarah, thanks a million for the book names I will go searching for them a bit later.

Bec - You didn't offend at all. Bit of background info, DH and I grew up differently, his family like to keep 'secrets' from him, and mine were always honest. When I was 10 my mum collapsed at home early one morning. My dad took her to the local hospital, then she was sent onto a bigger hospital, operated on and told she had cancer and only had a couple of months to live. They then came back later and said it wasn't cancer, but endometriosis, it was about to attack her liver and other organs. They did a 'complete' hysterectomy (mum's words) and when she finally got home, mum laid up on the lounge while dad explained what had happened to mum and that she now had a double colostomy, and even showed us what it all looked like. Like I said, I was 10, my brother 6.
When I was about 13, I got called to the school office, only to be met by my dad. I instantly knew something was wrong with mum. They had to go away for a few days, mum's kidneys were failing. When she first visited the dialysis unit, we were with her, we saw it all. She spent close to 10 years waiting for a transplant, so the nurses were (and still are) like family. I suppose this is probably why I believe that honesty is the best policy, it's all I know, but we will have to be careful to not overload DD like you said, just answer the questions she has.


Nic