Long Term TTC & Assisted Conception - Nov 2007 #2

**Melsta** · November 6th, 2007, 08:27 AM

Missy - good luck with everything today and positive thinking that everything will be fine for your transfer !!!

BW - I hope that everything works out over Christmas and I can sympathise along with everyone else here so you are definitely not alone and always know that to vent to us is in the confidence and secure environment that you need, I think that venting and getting support from our group here is one major factor that makes this process so much easier.

I have basically built a wall when it comes to family and bounce it off, it is the only way that I can cope. My DH family knows that I have cycle issues and have had cysts so the "disapproving looks" I feel I get whenever they mention kids around us is heartbreaking for me as I feel like they have decided I have robbed my DH of the chance to provide him with children, when in fact unfortunately he is as much a part of the reason why we are on IVF.

At the end of the day I know it is no consolation, but I hope that hearing we are all going through the same emotions and situations gives you a little bit more ease of the heartache surrounding christmas ....

Tiggerlinda - I am so sorry to hear your news .... I hope that you can take some time out for yourself and DH to rest up and take care ...

Sharon - hi and welcome. Unfortunately our hormones tend to take over dont they and we not only worry about it not working, but worry too about everything that is happening and i think as someone else here pointed out, we worry about it keeping it all together, especially as so many of us are going through this without family support (as I believe that we have friendship support here in BB).

The biggest thing I have learnt through this with my DH, is not to try and hold it all together and be strong at home 24/7. He is there for me every step of the way and if it means he needs to be there to wipe those tears, or settle my nerves and anxiety then that is his part in making this process work ... whether that works for everyone though, maybe not as these emotions and cycles affect different ppl in different ways, but each of us have a loving support network who are there to help us through the hard days ....

Sorry girls I feel like I am very rambly today

To everyone else, a big good morning to you all and hope that you all back a winner today on the melbourne cup !! Giddy Up !!!!

**tiggerlinda** · November 6th, 2007, 09:11 AM

Melsta - good advice

Sharon - Welcome and don't worry we all go through stages sweet just ask my DH

**dusty** · November 6th, 2007, 09:34 AM

missy (MM) thinking of you and sending you loads of

you deserve this and a playmate for callum!

pam (blackduckies) great to see you here hun. there is loads of advice on cycles and the rest. in regards to your question on the other thread i have heard that your eggs can cook or begin to break down if they leave them too long before EPU. that is why i am getting worried about mine.

melsta, your words really spoke to me and my DH - thanks for sharing hun, sometimes we say our best stuff when we ramble

The biggest thing I have learnt through this with my DH, is not to try and hold it all together and be strong at home 24/7. He is there for me every step of the way and if it means he needs to be there to wipe those tears, or settle my nerves and anxiety then that is his part in making this process work ... whether that works for everyone though, maybe not as these emotions and cycles affect different ppl in different ways, but each of us have a loving support network who are there to help us through the hard days ....

Sorry girls I feel like I am very rambly today

waiting on the clinic to tell me whether to trigger or not. getting concerned as my follies and E2 aren't getting much bigger CD17 today.

ETA: holly i too love your new av, it is very reflective of you

deni, welcome and may your journey be a short one. best of luck with your IUI. what christmas emoticions?

**Acacia** · November 6th, 2007, 09:46 AM

Thinking of you, missy! Remember to keep breathing!!

Melsta, that's a beautiful way to put what DH/partner can do and does do for us little ladies. I had a big chat with DF on Friday night last (in a big blah moment) about trying to manage on my own to spare him the stress of hormones/my concerns. But he's there 100% and wants to be so he can be part of the process as well. In return, we have our bad days, but when we're a little better on any which day it may be, I can then offer support and thanks and lots of love back to DF for what he's doing and who he is in the process. You expressed it wonderfully

Miss C

**Hollybolly** · November 6th, 2007, 10:05 AM

Hi Everyone

Some lovely advice happening in here at the moment - We are just so lucky to have BB and each other, aren't we?

Dusty - Your follies still have time to grow, sweetie, and if you haven't had your trigger, yet, they haven't yet had their 'kick up the bum', so they've still got some growing to do!

I always used the hot water bottle leading up to trigger - my NP told me that laying flat on a sturdy surface (the floor more so than a bed or lounge) and a hot water bottle over your ovaries for 20 mins at a time will stimulate them - that along with the drugs in your body will keep them moving, give that a go

You don't want too much stimulation, because you want that cyst to stay sleeping

Missy - You should be at the clinic now, but am sending lots and lots of baby dust your way - Can't wait to hear how you went xxx

Shannon & Dusty - Thanks for your comments about my avatar... Isn't she lovely?!

If only we could all look as glamourous as they portray!!!

Hope everyone else is wonderful xxx

ETA. Shannon, I hope the witch shows up for you soon... Would be perfect to keep her away from here, you can have her! xxx

**Melsta** · November 6th, 2007, 10:28 AM

Hollybolly - thanks for that tip about the hot water bottle, this is why I love this forum so much as it is this type of advice and hints you just dont get from the clinic unless you specifically ask ... I shall have to try that as I head toward that stage ..

Dusty - yeah I have big rambles but on mornings when I have cleared the emotions away

... my DH is my strongest supporter and best friend hence why I married him (awww!!) but yes without his strength this would be unimaginable ... take care of that cyst wont you now ... and I am sure the clinic will be in touch soon ... sending lots of positive

your way ...

Miss C - I hear you re good days and it sounds like we are very similar. I tend to want to spare my DH from the "negative" emotions but unfortunately he knows me too too well, so in turn can read my like a book. All I know is to share the ups and downs between us is far better, after all in any other situation or topic, the ups and downs in a marriage or partnership are jointly shared, so this should be too. How are those wedding plans coming along - you and your DH have some wonderful memories to create right now in planning the first day of the rest of your lives, that in itself is such a beautiful and rewarding journey ...

I like to think I am a bit of a romantic (celebrating 3, 6 and 9 months of marriage in the lead up to the big 1 year, you girls wouldnt have guessed by much

) but I like to give back to my DH in the little things, just to make him realise that I appreciate everything he is going through as well.

I guess for me and my DH, I always take into account how my DH feels as well that we are going through this, as part of it is due to his genetic make-up, so for me to bear this alone makes him feel even worse, yet by sharing and making his backbone the stronger one to carry me, somehow in its own little weird way, makes up for his insecurities .... if that is even the right word ...

Now onto these avatar's - I need help lolol - how do you set these up ?!?! I am not really that technical

**Missy** · November 6th, 2007, 10:50 AM

Ok all. Well transfer is done. Had 2 beaut blasties and one that is abit slow and they didnt think it will make it. They will ring me tomorrow to see how it goes. So I had the 2 good ones put back and now just have to wait. 19th is when the BT is. Im very happy and feeling so pos++ about it all.

Melsta that is so true hun. We dont have to put a brave face on and I know I dont. I cry when I feel that I have to and every one at home knows when Im upset. You cant not hold back the emotions. Its just now right.

Thank you all so much for your kind words.

**sushee** · November 6th, 2007, 10:53 AM

Melsta,

the avatars are one of the perks of upgrades to paid membership.

**Melsta** · November 6th, 2007, 10:58 AM

sushee - thanks for the update on that ... !!

Missy - Congrats on the two beaut blasties !! Great to see a positive result there for you sweetie, keep up those positive vibes as it all helps in the end ... sending you loads and loads of

and

that the little ones stick !!

**Missy** · November 6th, 2007, 11:09 AM

Thankyou so much hun.

**dusty** · November 6th, 2007, 11:30 AM

yay MM!! way to go girl. i hope you can celebrate with DH tonight.
holly, thanks for the calming and practical advice hun. i will definitely try it out. come on follies you can make it!

**deni** · November 6th, 2007, 12:13 PM

Hey girls!

Missy - fab news about your transfer, how exciting! keep up those fantastic vibes and hope the time to the 19th flies by quickly with the best news at the end!

BW - sorry to hear the lead up to Christmas is a difficult time hun.. It's so frustrating to feel the pressures and pulls from everyone around, like people forget what Christmas is all about and you end up being railroaded into something you'd rather not do. Hope you and DH have a lovely and restful time together, whatever is decided.

Dusty -

you get the go ahead soon. Hope that hot water bottle helps!

Pam - welcome! Best wishes for your first IVF cycle !

Melsta - your DH sounds so lovely. Thanks for the words of encouragement! I've got to remember not to get so wrapped up in myself that I forget that DH must find it difficult too. He's not the greatest at knowing the best thing to say, but he does give me a nice cuddles.

to all the other ladies - have a great day!

I had my CD9 scan today and things seem to be looking OK, hope to have confirmation this afternoon of when the IUI will happen.

I’ve decided no more talking about this process at work. In the previous months I’ve been telling a few people at work and they’ve been very supportive and well meaning but now I feel there are no boundaries and I’m not always wanting to talk about it. So I’m taking a polite approach and hopefully they will understand and just wait until I’m ready (which won’t be until I’ve got a well-confirmed pregnancy!) Thank God for BB to get all this stuff off my chest !!!

YOU GIRLS ROCK!

**Missy** · November 6th, 2007, 12:18 PM

Hey Deni thanks so much.

Im glad your scan went well hun. Nice when it doesn. I only told a about 4 people at work when I was doing the IVF with DS. Its good but as you said some times you dont want to talk to them. I really hope they understand better then mine did. Had one that got the ****, When I was thinking I was getting AF she turned to me and said " well you cant exspect it to work first go" well did that hit me. Oh well stick back at her as it did work first go. Hun I wish you lots of luck with everything .

barney · November 6th, 2007, 12:26 PM

yay for you missy well done my sweet you are now on your way to being pg all the best hun and take care i cant wait till the 19th now for your results

**tiggerlinda** · November 6th, 2007, 12:28 PM

MM - Well done

Dusty - I too have had the heat advice from my AP as HB suggested + remember mine did grow too

Sharon - I understand about work my team is very undertanding

Meltsa - Hang in there

**Hollybolly** · November 6th, 2007, 12:37 PM

Yay Missy!!!

So happy for you sweetie... 2 fantastic little fighters, you are on your way now!
So glad to hear wonderful news - and you were right, no news WAS good news from the clinic

Here's hoping the 2ww goes as speedy as possible for you xxx

**Melsta** · November 6th, 2007, 01:19 PM

deni - glad to hear that all went well on your scan this morning, make sure you keep us updated on the next stage.

I hope that everything goes smoothly for you at work, I think alot of ppl dont realise how intruding it can be when all they want to talk about is IVF/IUI with you ... for alot of them I think it is the unkown factors of it all ... but good for you for putting a boundary in place and if they dont respond to the politeness from you, you can always step the boundary up a notch

.... and just think you can always go to home to cuddles from your DH

Missy -

Had one that got the ****, When I was thinking I was getting AF she turned to me and said " well you cant exspect it to work first go"

Wow hun I cant believe the nerve of some people ... I can imagine how awful that was for you, man some ppl really need to learn tact and decorum ..... anyway onwards and upwards for your 2WW ....