Working Mummies Support Group

[crumpet]

hi everyone, thought id join in here if thats ok?

im working full time and have a 2yo thats in full time child care i have some mummy guilt about that, but thats a whole other story

we have had issues with the whole kinder situation as well, our local kinder (2 minutes from home) only does half days, yep real helpful for working mums!

we are tossing up between sending her to a private ELC that then runs into the private Primary school and private high school in a setting which would really suit her, or keeping her at her child care center who run a kinder program in a setting which she loves but isnt as great education wise.

[wysiwyg]

Hi Crumpet - yes the kinder hours are so awkward -if I end up going back full-time we had thought about private ELC because actually works out same as daycare cost wise for five days, but as would still have DS in daycare that would be awkward, plus I like the more play based approach of the daycare center (and they wouldn't go to the private primary or high schoool as finances wouldn't allow). I am still trying to decide if is worth putting name down for any 4 year old kinders - in case I don't have a job next year (my current contract is only till July) - because maybe if didn't have a job then would ditch some of the childcare and do that.

Veus - I currently have the opposite situation - work is way too demanding of my brain power and time at the moment - the days are just too long - dropping the kids off at 7:30 and picking up at 17:45 by time home just have no time. I think after this contract may try to get shorter hours just an hour less would be great - problem is unlikely to get an hour less and more money and CC fees are the same whatever time pick them up. Sometimes I think five days a week but just till 3:00 would be my preference but again the CC fees don't make that a good option.

I have in the past had periods where felt I was just killing time and not being very productive (one of those times was when part-time) - not sure I have any advice apart from a colleague did say to me that everyone has times like that whether full-time or part-time and not to place too much stock in the thoughts that I was being given the less fun stuff to do because I was part-time. Luckily for me I seem to be able to get enjoyment from most roles if I try hard enough (practice from when I worked in a factory on a production line every summer through uni). I also suppose when I was part-time before I knew it wasn't forever because I knew was planning on having a number 2. Now maybe it would be different.

A question - how do people deal with competing requirements from your and DH jobs? E.g. I do drop off, and DH does pick up - but if DH has to work late or something then I have to do both - meaning I have to leave early. So far it hasn't been too big a deal but I can see it becoming a problem - if one of the kids is sick at the moment DH would probably take day off, because I am a contractor so if I don't work I don't get paid (and still have to pay CC fees) - but as his job ramps up then that might not be so easy. Prior to kids - my job was the one that always took precedence because that earn't the money - and he didn't like his anyway - but now he is finally in the field he wants to be and likes his job. If only places were less focused on what you do rather than how long you are in the office.

[wysiwyg]

Hi Crumpet - yes the kinder hours are so awkward -if I end up going back full-time we had thought about private ELC because actually works out same as daycare cost wise for five days, but as would still have DS in daycare that would be awkward, plus I like the more play based approach of the daycare center (and they wouldn't go to the private primary or high schoool as finances wouldn't allow). I am still trying to decide if is worth putting name down for any 4 year old kinders - in case I don't have a job next year (my current contract is only till July) - because maybe if didn't have a job then would ditch some of the childcare and do that.

Veus - I currently have the opposite situation - work is way too demanding of my brain power and time at the moment - the days are just too long - dropping the kids off at 7:30 and picking up at 17:45 by time home just have no time. I think after this contract may try to get shorter hours just an hour less would be great - problem is unlikely to get an hour less and more money and CC fees are the same whatever time pick them up. Sometimes I think five days a week but just till 3:00 would be my preference but again the CC fees don't make that a good option.

I have in the past had periods where felt I was just killing time and not being very productive (one of those times was when part-time) - not sure I have any advice apart from a colleague did say to me that everyone has times like that whether full-time or part-time and not to place too much stock in the thoughts that I was being given the less fun stuff to do because I was part-time. Luckily for me I seem to be able to get enjoyment from most roles if I try hard enough (practice from when I worked in a factory on a production line every summer through uni). I also suppose when I was part-time before I knew it wasn't forever because I knew was planning on having a number 2. Now maybe it would be different.

A question - how do people deal with competing requirements from your and DH jobs? E.g. I do drop off, and DH does pick up - but if DH has to work late or something then I have to do both - meaning I have to leave early. So far it hasn't been too big a deal but I can see it becoming a problem - if one of the kids is sick at the moment DH would probably take day off, because I am a contractor so if I don't work I don't get paid (and still have to pay CC fees) - but as his job ramps up then that might not be so easy. Prior to kids - my job was the one that always took precedence because that earn't the money - and he didn't like his anyway - but now he is finally in the field he wants to be and likes his job. If only places were less focused on what you do rather than how long you are in the office.

[Astrid]

DH is full-time, so really his job takes precedence. Money wise it brings in the most. I was fortunate enough to find part-time work that fits with school hours (but not kinder ). So do the drop offs and pick up on the way to and from work.
We share the load with sick days thankfully and he will often take some annual leave during school holidays to help out.

[crumpet]

its such a difficult decision, but we have just thrown ourselves another spanner in the works by deciding to try for number 2 at the end of the year, so DD will probably stick to child care's kinder program now.

has anyone got 2 kids and work full time?

im thinking ill take 6 months off whenever i have number 2 so they will both go to child care but work is flexible.
ill get a return to work bonus of 3 months wages which i can choose to get in a lump sum to offset child care fees or i can choose to work say 3 or 4 days a week and still be paid full time.
im not sure what option to take!

[wysiwyg]

its such a difficult decision, but we have just thrown ourselves another spanner in the works by deciding to try for number 2 at the end of the year, so DD will probably stick to child care's kinder program now.

has anyone got 2 kids and work full time?

im thinking ill take 6 months off whenever i have number 2 so they will both go to child care but work is flexible.
ill get a return to work bonus of 3 months wages which i can choose to get in a lump sum to offset child care fees or i can choose to work say 3 or 4 days a week and still be paid full time.
im not sure what option to take!

In terms of the lump sum vs 3 or 4 days a week - you would have to do the calculations - but with the child care rebate cap you basically get rebate for 3 ish days the other two days you pay full fees - so your fees for 3 to 4 days will be far less than 5 days - so that accompanied by getting the day or two at home I would probably go for the part-time - depends on the figures really and how much you need the money. Of course they might up the rebate cap between now and you needing to decide or other childcare things could change due to election so calculations now might not be true about the future.

I don't work full-time officially but I have worked some full-time weeks on this contract (my mum is over from UK so fills in the two days where I don't have childcare) which is up in July, after that I may need to look at full time again. At the moment though financially I am not sure is beneficial working full time from a money perspective because of the full time childcare fees for two (41K) and also I really dislike not the fact they are at childcare everyday as such but the rushing around and so little home time because of it (e.g. we leave home at 7:15ish, we get home 18:00). Maybe if I can sort shorter hours 5 days a week and come up with some way of reducing amount spend on childcare then that would work better. Or if I could find a job with very short travel time.

Astrid - You see I earn same as DH even though I am part time to his full time - but I am contracting so doesn't directly equate anyway - also it has taken him a long time to get into the area he has and he always used to take the back seat to my job, so on the one hand I feel it is his turn to put his first but need to balance that against the need for money and contracting you are expected to put in your daily hours and then some in most roles. Also his role is only till end of Q1 2015. I hadn't even considered school holidays and what will do then. It makes my brain hurt trying to work out what will work best all round - July isn't that far away and I want to make sure I do the right thing.

[wysiwyg]

Double post

[peanutter]

Any chance or a nanny? Would that work out better?

Good luck

I was talking with a client today, who said that his wife had gone back to work for 3 days a week, and he was so glad, because "she was literally getting dumber by the day". Do people really speak like that about mothers (parents) who have been SAHP? He wasn't saying that she was glad to be more stimulated, or to be among grown ups, or appreciating different types of challenges, or urinating without an audience ... he was saying categorically, to his lawyer over coffee that his wife was haemorrhaging neurons being away from an office so it's good she's "back in the game" three days a week, so that he's not being made stupid by association through the lack of intellectual conversation over his meat and three veg at 7pm every evening.

FFS. Some people.

Even if he's repeating something she's said, that doesn't make it ok for him to say it about her behind her back. So disrespectful. If my husband said that about this working mumma, I'd be livid.

Rant over.