Thank you all so much for you replies. It has taken me a really really long time to come back to this thread. I now completely understand where my sister is coming from I am more than happy (bad wording but can't think of another way) for her to take her grief out on me - it is how she needs to be to try and survive my pregnancy. I will be here if but hopefully when she is ready.
What I am still absolutely devestated about is my mum and dad. I am crying at least once a day about it. They refuse to acknowledge my pregnancy and baby . I took some advice posted on here and called mum to talk about it. I told her how much I was hurt by her refusing to acknowledge my baby, her grandchild. I was told that I just had to accept that I have hurt them so much and I just need to give them time . This was when I was 7 weeks pregnant. I am now 23 weeks and still no acknowledgement of my pregnancy. I am absolutely devestated. I don't even call my mum anymore because I cry for days after I talk to her because she never asks. I saw mum a few weeks ago and found myself hiding my bump so I could pretend I wasn't pg when I was there so I didn't have to acknowledge my mum doesn't care about her grandchild.
How is that fair to my baby/me??
I sit here everynight crying wondering what I have done?
Is she even going to hold my baby? Is she going to come to the hospital to meet him/her? I shouldn't have these thoughts about my own mum meeting my baby .
I am riddled with guilt when all I am doing is bringing another precious baby into our life - I am not or even trying to replace my sister's baby.
I have nightmares that she refuses to call my baby it's name and only my sister's babys name because I should never have done this to our family.

This is even starting to affect her relationship with my other two kids because she won't see me. I asked her to pick up a parcel to take to my other sister and she told me to leave it in the mailbox so she didn't have to come in. I sat in my lounge room crying as I watched her pick it up and not come in to see me or my kids. We have seen her once in months when we used to see each other once/twice a month for the weekend and talk every other day on the phone. The kids have also stopped asking about them.

Sorry this makes no sense. I am just devestated. I have no-one I can talk to about it. DH is devestated the same as me and seeing me so upset just makes him so mad with my mum so I don't like to bring it up with him.
This is the selfish part - this is ruining my pregnancy and my joy of my precious baby and last pregnancy. I shouldn't have to sit here in tears every day but I am just completely lost what to do.