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Thread: I don't know what to do...

  1. #19

    Join Date
    Oct 2006
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    I agree with SB, if it doesn't feel right, don't rush it.



    Perhaps lend it to friend for a while to use and then when it is returned see how you feel about selling it then. Whilst someone else is using it you might find that the decision to let it go is easier or you might want it back.

    I would say though, if you are feeling sick about a bid, then it is too early to let it go.

    Spring xx

  2. #20

    Join Date
    Sep 2004
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    Melb - where my coolness isn't seen as wierdness
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    Big Willow hun. I suspect this will forever be a difficut thing to let go of. Spring might be right, it might be too early, but if you're anything like me, never will still be too early.

    It will hurt and will likely hurt for ever if you let it go, but please know it will never hurt as much as it will when it first walks out the door. From then on in, it will get better, even if it never goes away.

    In your heart, only you will know if you can take the pain of it right now, or if you have to wait until you're stronger. Letting this basket go will not mean you're betraying your memories - no one can take your memories from you - it means you're finding some closure, and finding closure can be such a difficult thing, so you've got to be ready for it, mentally and emotionally.

    Whatever you decide, I hope you find peace with it. It's okay for you to be good to yourself and wait some more before making a decision.

  3. #21

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    Thank you so much girls...

    I'm in tears over this right now...I thought I was so ready to let it go, that having L use it somehow 'changed' the way I felt about it but it doesn't really. That's my baby's bed and my baby will never, ever get to sleep it in.

    I just don't know if keeping it is the right thing to do. We really have no where to put it. I know my parents would take it for me. I think Dad would be OK now, he is doing much better with it now that he has his first grandson

    But I think it's too late anyway - once someone has put a bid in on aren't you obligated to sell? Or can I pull the auction before it ends and no harm done?

    I just don't know what to do (again!) I will admit I am surprised that this has upset me. I thought I'd past all that really intense grief.

    **ETA: Sushee - I just called my mum (bawling...poor mum ) and she said a similar thing to you. That maybe this is the closure I need and that's why it's so hard. Having the bassinette or not having it doesn't change any of my memories or feelings about my baby. I have lots of other momentos (ultrasound pictures, pregnancy tests etc) that I have kept.

  4. #22

    Join Date
    Sep 2004
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    Willow,

    allow yourself to grieve all over again. It was never going to be easy letting this basket go, and I honestly don't it it will get easier for you no matter how much time passes. And why would it be easy? Your hurt is so valid and real and shows how much your angel means to you.

    You know, it may help you to see someone come to get it who will love it as much you as do. You're not giving him away, not how much he meant to you, or how much you love him, by letting this go, but you may never fully realise it until it's gone. And if it means you cry and hurt, that's just shows how much your memories mean to you.

    And I put something up on Ebay that I changed my mind about selling, despite having bids on it. I contacted the bidder and explained that I'd changed my mind because I wasn't ready to let it go after all, and she was really understanding, and allowed me to end my auction so I could keep it. It might work for you too if you decide to keep it.

  5. #23

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    I honestly don't it it will get easier for you no matter how much time passes.
    I agree Sushee, which is why i'm thinking I should just do it, grieve the letting go if I have to, and move on. It's never going to get any easier and it's just not practical for me to keep it forever.

    You're not giving him away, not how much he meant to you, or how much you love him, by letting this go
    Thank you, this is exactly what I needed to hear....

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