My two miscarriages were quiet early (bubs were only 4w3d and 5w2d)

Personally I didn't avoid pregnant women after these. As sad as they were my way of thinking is that there was something wrong with them to stop them developing further.

After Nikita died (she was 16 weeks preterm and 8 days old when she passed) we have a newborn at her funeral which was difficult and I did avoid other pregnant women for a few months but after that I realised that you can't avoid it. I saw preggie women and newborns more than ever and I just had to get use to it.

Sorry I know that seems like really cold way of looking at it but sooner or later they will be right under your nose and you will have to face it.


Putting this into persepctive for you though -

I think if the family gathering will be too hard then don't go. I cannot imagine how hard that will be especially with a group of insentitive people around you. Snide remarks are so unhelpful with the healing process.
That being said depending on how long ago you lost your baby, it could be an excellent opportunity to face what you fear to start the next phase of the healing process. Just go for a little while make an appearence and see how you go.
Its very hard when things are still so fresh though so make your decision closer to when time comes. Maybe if your DP goes in representation of you both and sends your well wishes?

Its a tough call - these are the things we all have to face at one time or another but i promise you the first time will always be the hardest, it does get easier