It is certainly an emotional rollercoaster hun, my thoughts are with you and Jett at this precious time.

FWIW, you haven't failed him, and you still can reassure him everything will be ok. Soon you should be able to do the 'top to toe' washes, change the nappies etc. We had a wooky system where I had one and DD had one, I would wear it usually stuffed down my bra lol. At each visit I would swap the wookies over to help get used to each others scent.

Massive hugs for you, you're a brave & strong woman :-)