It was published in a copy of Melbourne Child last year.... I've only just managed to track it down online. Very thought provoking. At first I found all the X words (eg Xperiment) to be annoying but I went with it never the less.
I was kind of waiting for a punch line because of all the 'Xperiments' etc.
I am a bit confused. Is the new baby 'Y' because of the question 'why?' - I read the whole thing as being Baby X because both girls and boys have an X chromosone but only boys have XY chromosones ... so that bit threw me a little. I guess I just didn't get the 'Y' bit at the end.
They're not wrong on baby clothes though ... they only come in boy and girl. We like to err on the side of neutral, and there's blue with trains, pink with butterflies, and even yellow is creeping into the girl's domain now. Green is the last bastion of neutrality - we have our lump wearing a green onesie with a large label saying "BABY" (in case you can't tell) and a teddy bear on it.
It doesn't work in the long term though, my eldest is the girliest girl of girlness and I didn't do a thing to encourage it. Although climbing trees in your frilly pink dress because you refuse to wear jeans does result in a lot of torn clothes and bleeding legs. She thinks all boys have short hair and all girls have long hair - and conveniently ignores that her mother, father, stepfather, and grandmother violate this prime directive.
But do children really have a choice when so many people treat them differently from the moment they are born? I find it interesting that people want their children to be able to choose their "faith" when they grow up.... but are happy to make the gender role choice for them from day one.
I admit it: I re-inforce gender roles with my children too... but on the whole I at least aspire to neutrality. Most gender roles lay down more limitations than freedoms... and some kids especially end up really struggling with that. I'm quite relieved that my DH supports my views and isn't too much of a "blokey bloke" to admonish my sons for being sensitive and affectionate. I can be as "girly" as the next woman when i choose... but I don't need it to define who I am at all times. Unlike a neighbour of mine who never mows the lawn or is seen covered in dirt in the garden "that's my husbands job"... I mean think about it... imagine if her husband refused to change a nappy or vacuum and said "that's women's work". Hmmm
My son wears clothes with flowers on - he loves them. His favourite towel is hot pink. He has trains and lego and a kitchen set. His favourite tank engine is Rosie. He kisses his soft toys and is affectionate. He gets cuddles when he cries - I proudly tell other parents that if he can cry from a fall like that and blame another child who was over 10ft away at the time he'll grow up to play football for England (gets a laugh, I don't say that to DS). DS has his own jewellery. He loves dancing, especially to ABBA.
He's a boy who I treat as a child. Would I do the same to a girl? Most likely. I may limit the flowers though. DS has limited flowers. And DS loves having short hair, another child may want longer hair for hairgrips. He plays with boys and girls and has fun.
Yes, he likes cars. But so does his dad. And his mum, for that matter. He also likes musicals. Like his mum (but not his dad). He loves make-up and hairdressing. He loves looking after babies. He helps with housework. He asks to come shopping with me. He also loves trains and rolling in the mud. I wouldn't have it any other way!
Now I'm off to bake butterfly buns and play dinosaurs. You can know a child's gender and still let that child develop a non-gender-based personality!
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