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Thread: Can you get better with motherhood?

  1. #1

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    Lightbulb Can you get better with motherhood?

    I was trying to find any sites or examples of real women (not hollywood) where going through the process of motherhood makes you a better person. I know there is a lot of bad aspects to it but I want to see the good - after all I'm not doing this for mothers day breakfasts.

    So here is the question:



    If you have already made this transition what has changed for the better? These can be either physically, emotionaly, mentaly or spiritually.

    Please share your positive changes, even if your still pregnant with your first. I'm sure I'm not the only one who wants to see the positives.

    I'll get the ball rolling:

    If I hadn't become pregnant I wouldn't have realised that I still had body image issues. For me to support this child I will have to learn to love my body for what it is and when I reach that point I will be better for embracing Motherhood.

    Your turn....

  2. #2

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    I must say that I am more at peace with my body image then before kids. I also think I have a nicer body (if I do say so myself LOL) then bebore I had kids. I have boobs & curves LOL. Before I was a stick with a face.

  3. #3

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    If i hadn't of become pregnant / a mum, i wouldn't have realised that i still car WAAAYYY too much about what other people think of me. Where i need to learn that it doesnt matter, because I am happy, and I think this is / I am right.
    I am slowly learning that I am just as human as everybody else and that I don't have to care!

    What a good thread!

  4. #4

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    If i hadnt become pregnant - i would have never known the amazing feeling to have a beautiful human being grown inside me, and how miracalous and blessed it felt to do so.

    If i hadnt become a mother - i wouldnt have the understanding for all other parents in the world who's children scream on public transport and get filthy looks for sour people
    - I wouldnt have ever understood that it was possible to love someone more than life itself and become such a lioness in protecting her.

  5. #5

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    I've learnt to be excited about little things again. A rainbow is a big deal and so is a spider in the bathtub lol.

  6. #6

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    I have FINALLY learnt to share my food

    Seriously though it has taught me how to accept my body and like it just the way it is, it has taught me to love someone without boundaries, it has taught me that I am stronger than I ever thought possible and it has taught me to laugh at the little things.

  7. #7

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    Well I don't know about others but your comments so far have put a smile on my face.

    I thought of another one:

    Since becomming pregnant I have seen my own mother (and MIL) in a new light. I am more forgiving and understanding of their decisions and the past.

    This really hit home when I realised that every decision I make affects their little life. While I will make mistakes I know I am trying my absolute best - just as my parents were trying to do for me.

    Keep up the positive comments, I know you've made at least one persons day brighter.

  8. #8

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    For short term my body image improved alot. After 10 years though, I'd still like to feel better about myself. HOwever.......
    I have learnt a new level of compassion.
    I have learnt how to put my self in other people's shoes
    I have become MUCh easier to set off into tears!!
    I truly appreciate what my parents did for me.
    Mainly though, it's taught me that there is nothing on this earth like the love of a mother for their child. I would do ANYTHING and go ANYWHERE for my children. I can't believe how strong the love is. I also have to remember that other mothers feel the same about their kids, and this has helped me especially with MIL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  9. #9

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    Quote Originally Posted by dachlostar View Post
    I've learnt to be excited about little things again. A rainbow is a big deal and so is a spider in the bathtub lol.
    I agree with your one whole heartedly. How pretty a flower is, how amazing the rain feels on your face, spinning til you fall down is fun.... Just the little things that you forget about are brought back to life once you're a mum.

  10. #10

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    Amen Dach.

    I learned how much patience I never even knew I had.
    I learned how I could be what i had previously thought was deaths door with illness and still carry on and be bright and cheerful.
    I learned to trust and have faith in me.
    I understood the need to stand in the doorway way after bedtime and watch a small person sleep.

  11. #11

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    I'm still pregnant but have learnt to love my pregnant body. I've learnt that regardless of your age (I'll be 42 next month) it really is possible to glow when pregnant and if I'd managed to have children when I was young I probably would've had a few as I'm taking to it so well (that idealistic view could of course change when I hit the delivery suite).

    I have a 5yo step daughter and one of the earliest things she taught me (she's been in my life since she was 2) was not to be so afraid of germs. I can now sit on a public loo - I never could before but realised I had to do it when she was with me or else she'd end up with a complex about them. I can also share her food, and I don't stress about the sticky fingers that go in and out of the lolly bowl or the chip bowl. It just doesn't bother me anymore.

  12. #12

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    I can laugh at myself or make a fool of myself just to see my children laugh. I can love someone with such intensity it hurts even when they are driving me crazy!

  13. #13

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    I have learnt to laugh at so many little things.
    I have become more selfless than I ever thought possible.
    I have come to appreciate and love the person that my DH is more than I ever did before..... we have become closer and although I would never have a baby to repair a marriage, in our case it did help us both heal.
    I haven't felt emotions so intensely ever before in my life..... and so many all at the same time! Such wonder, sadness, happiness, joy, ecstacy, frustration and love all at the one time!
    I have learnt to like myself and to be proud of myself as a person, and in particular as a brilliant mother (most of the time!)

  14. #14

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    I have learnt that there is nothing better than the smile of your child.
    I understand why a mother will give up everything to see her child light up with joy.
    I have learnt that the most precious gift in the world is a hug from your child just because they love you.

  15. #15

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    I have learnt that I can cry,anywhere, anytime, just by thinking of my daughter! lol
    She has taught me to appreciate each day so much more than I have ever done.
    She has taught me how real the fear of loss really is, and to understand why we fight so hard to hang on
    I have learnt that I actually have maternal instincts, I can actually be a good mummy, even though I doubt it every day!
    I have leant that men truly do love the curve(and hang) of the breastfeeding breast *thanks god for that!*
    Oh and what chloe and Sarah said - I don't think Ive been so dizzy sice I was 7 lol

  16. #16
    morgan78 Guest

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    I have learnt to be patience and not throw temper tantrums
    I wouldnt have ever understood that it was possible to love someone more than life itself and become such a lioness in protecting her.
    Most definately.
    And there is nothing better than the smile/hug of a child first thing in the morning no matter what time it is.

    What a great thread

  17. #17

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    I have learned that I can function on two hours of sleep!

    Parenting causes "soul growth". You must be selfless, patient, understanding, considerate, generous, and kind to be a mother, and those are traits that will make you a much better person.

  18. #18

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    what a brilliant thread.

    each of my three children have taught me something different.... My first, Laura taught me what unconditional love really is, my second, Nathan, taught me how to play, and that its ok to live in your imagination for the day (me robin, to his batman, wendy to his bob the builder ) and my third, Aston has taught me how to forgive, and that love really can heal a broken heart.

    but i think the biggest thing i have learnt from all three of them is what a privledge it is to be a part of their lives.

    and in answer to the question of the thread - Yes I have definately become a better person through motherhood.
    Last edited by tiggerandpooh; April 17th, 2008 at 07:41 AM.

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