BG - I am the same as you, hell I am still buying baby furnishings and bits and bobs and I am not even pregnant yet I figure If i get what I want while I am working and able to pay for it then by the time I need to stop working i will have most things I "need" to get going.

But again I will be a first time mum - in a round about way (second baby but will be the first to bring home) so have no idea

I love the list idea and most baby showers I have been to have been more about cloths and little things rather than things of necessity like car seats, cots, prams etc

Its a bit of a stretch but maybe if the issue is more with the people telling you NOT to buy then perhaps seek their advice on whether they feel a "Gift registery" or "wish list" type thing would help.

You can set these up at most places and from some online places PLUS you can access it to see whats been "crossed off" the list. You may even be able to stock up on those special creams etc for sensitive skin??