DH and I have been having a tough week with sex related aspects of our relationship . Its come out that he's been looking at stuff on the internet, which has made me feel quite anxious. Amidst a drama and tears he told me how our infertility affected him sexually - I think he sees me as more mother than lover now. I can't help worrying that it could get even worse after the baby arrives. Even now he's hesitant to have sex as he's worried he'll hurt the baby or something will happen. I'm not at all used to him not wanting me as he had a very big drive when we were first together, and I'm worried that if he doesn't desire me anymore he'll need to find it somewhere else.

We are such good partners in so many ways and I thought everything was going great. He said he didn't want to hurt me by telling me how he was feeling, but it hurts me more that he didn't share with me so there was this sneaky element. My father was unfaithful to my mum and they split up when I was 7, so I don't have a very good father role model in that way. I would be so devastated if that happened in our relationship - I guess anyone would be.

I know every individual and couple is different, but I guess there are also some common worries and issues that surface for people in our situation.

Has anyone been through this? How was your relationship during pregnancy and after the baby?