MummaSue: Thats EXACTLY how I feel. Im terrified of getting attached incase something goes wrong, in my head its like I wont be so devastated because I knew something was going to go wrong/in denial iykwim. I read your thread too, the responses helped me alot

Synchronicity: I think your right re the being a LTTTC thing.

Thankyou so much everyone for replying, it means so much to me. I feel alot better now I have talked about it.