Hey Ahurani,

I just want to reiterate what everyone else has already said. It is definitely the LTTTCer thing going on. I think it's only now that I'm starting to bond with my bub. I was always, and still am I waiting for something to go wrong. I kept on feeling like my pregnancy was a dream and I was hallucinating due to the TTC stress and any moment I would wake up and find that I did dream it all. DP was worried about me in the first half of the pregnancy because I barely wanted to talk about it, prepare for the baby or anything.

I've just come back from a pregnancy class at the hospital and they showed a fetal development DVD. I had tears in my eyes as they showed the egg and sperm meet because I felt so inadequate that my body didn't work the way it was supposed to. There are definitely some hangover affects from LTTTC and it affects us all differently. I don't think these feelings will go, but hopefully they will begin to take a back seat at some point.

Be kind to yourself and just take each day as it comes. There will come a point when you are emotionally ready to bond with your baby. It's okay if you're not there yet.