Pregnancy after Long Term TTC #6 - 2009

[barney]

[B]

Then as I was sitting down to a lovely tea DF made his mum rang. and the following rolled out "I was thinking I'd love to be around for the birth" "would you be happy with that" "can you pay for 1/2 my ticket!" out of the blue. DF and his mum are rocky at best, she's comming from Tassie and I'm assuming will want to stay here. Now there are two thoughts in my mind. 1 it's a nice thing she hasn't done for any other grandchild (8 total) and it's a nice chance for her and DF to bond a bit. Grandpa is not welcome (ex alcaholic and has an apauling way with women). Thought 2. This is my FIRST baby, I don't know you that much, your son doesn't like you that much (it swings) and you're going to be in my house, life when life is about to be turned on it's head. OH and I have to pay 1/2!

UMMMM LET ME THINK ABOUT IT....NO.........
omg how dare she just take it upon herslf to ask this WHATEVA
no swwety you be honest and if this is what you want then ok but if not you say that darlin and do not feel guilty or anything like that

hello my beauties I HAVENT SPEWED TODAY pmsl
had a very good day got out flood relief money so went payed some bills dh and i both got a new pair of havvys (thongs lol) sitting here now with the a/c on.
also my g/d results are all good so i can just keep feeding my face with lollies and wonder why ive got so many pimples atm .

well im luven you all but no perssies today im very lazy ok lol.

BUT GRUB... gets dh cuddles soon,not long now sweet heart i dont know how you do it but i take my hat off to you,have a great haircut hun i cant wait to get mine all done

[airline]

LM...don't you worry. I was thinking about you and Ping today having your scans. So glad you saw the fluttery butterfly

We had our BT results and its 36000 which means it's continued to every 48hrs since last one..... we don't know. Maybe it got off to a slower start...it was only 80 at the first BT, but we're still in the game. DH has said he's going to have a sit in protest in the FS's office if he doesn't give me a scan tomorrow

Just found our first paralysis tick on gorgeous chocolate brown furbaby. Straight to vet..(we're too squeamish to try ourselves) and it was quite small but gotta keep her quiet tomorrow. (ha ha good luck trying that, she's a labrador!)

Off to make tandoori chicken with naan bread for dinner. Laters.

[Murph01]

Hello lovelies,
I'm so close to being back in the forum again I can taste it. I'm sure the courier is going to arrive with my new computer on Friday so I'll be back with a vengeance and that's a threat. Then I will leave and join my new friends in the parent room and wait for you there.

Just had to say a few things quickly (yeah right like I ever do anything quickly!)

Thank you all so much for all your comments after seeing my little poppet. You all commented on seeing my face but I know you were checking out the new milk jugs!! That ws the day after the milk came and boy oh boy, what a change, I felt like bricks were hanging from my shoulders. I was a bit scared but it doesn't last like that all solid and massive, they settle down again.

Airline, don't ever be sorry for the me posts, it takes everyone's mind off their own troubles and puts them to use in being there for you. You will do the same to someone else's me post. Yours was very hard to read and you were brave to share when you felt like a downer. We are all too aware of the downs that go with the ups so don't feel like you bring down the mood. I hope that you have that little heartbeat at your next scan. Huge hugs

Greenslw, like everyone else, I say don't do it and I"m sure you have made your decision now but I'll tell you my reasons. I am super close to my own mum and she came to be in town for the birth and to stay with us after I got out of hospital. I thought I would want and need her but the thing is, my DH Andy, was just awesome and he was with me every minute he could, waiting outside before visiting hours, staying late every night and the whole time around the birth was just about us and our baby. In the end, I even felt that I had compromised on the experience that Andrew and I had together. I can't fault my mum in any way, she's practically invisible she's so unobtrusive with everyone in my family and we love her to bits. My sister and brother and I are all married to people who are closer to our mum than they are to their own. all that said and I still felt that it should have just been Andrew and I. It was really lovely to share those earliest moments and have all my family travel to stay in separate accommodation when I was in hospital but when we went home, it should have been Andy, Jazz and me. You can't get back those earliest moments, the silly things, first bath, first walk in a pram, first time in her bed and you shouldn't have to compromise with anyone, let alone someone you don't even get along with. I'm only just now considering "letting" Andrew's mum stay with us in late January! there is just no way I want to feel uncomfortable around people and have no control. Phew...take a breath. Yep, we have issues (don't we all).

I will add more photos and update my own news later before I move on...I promise

[barney]

good morning to my girls i hope you all ahve a wonderful day

MURPH.. hey beautiful so nice to hear from you im missing you lol
LM. yay for your scan hunny

[LondonMiss]

Something nice that happened yesterday - my DH is lovely I should state first, but he's not very good at visualising the whole baby thing, he thinks of it as really my project if we're honest it really is. He is really good with kids once they interact, like many men I guess, he's a bit afraid of breakable babies. Anyway, he's been very supportive through out this process but in quite practical and statistical way if you see what I mean.

Anyway, last night, we went to this strange BBQ with the new mother/ newly separated. The baby wanted to sleep on someone, and she obviously wanted to relax for once, so I took the baby and he slept on me for a long time. Then I decided it was too cold (and secretly I wanted to sleep too, but I didn't tell them that) so I went into the lounge and I lay down, and he slept on top of me. He must have come in to find me, I was sound asleep. This morning, DH kissed me on the nose and told me I looked beautiful with the baby.

[airline]

lm...ahhhhhhh!

[Greenslw]

LondonMiss glad all was the right size, I love the discription of a butterfly hope you enjoyed dinner. just read second post that is so beautiful.

Kryawolfe did you get the house? and thanks for all your kind words.

Smithy for a spew free day. and for you words

Airline great news on BT.

Murph thank you for your words, that's how I feel, I've even been questioning my mum at the birth the last few days for all those reasons about needing special time etc. My mum did say she'd clean my house for me before I go home and I'm really happy for that to happen. Hearing you talk about how it was for you makes me smile which I need today had a big hormanal cry last night, time to smile now.

ATM feeling much better today. Last night was a mess. DF is giving up smoking and is being an ASSS seriously a bear with a tooth ache etc. So when I phoned yesterday and we discussed MIL it was all good, I felt good and though few that's done and dusted WELL. DF decided to put in his own two bobs worth after saying I need to do what's right for me!

"March is ages away" I calmly explained that I wasn't comfortable that his relationship with her isn't always smooth and I'd be worring about that and not the baby. I also said that it would be so supportive to have someone around later on when all the visitors disapear etc. He didn't even take his eyes off the telly (mistake number one) so I asked if he was listening? well he snapped cracked it at me. I fell apart and cried for like two hours. Did I get a hug? no the only think I got was a very genuine (obviously he did take in my conversation) "you are right babe and if she isn't ok with that she doesn't have to come" well instead of being happy he saw the light I cried more. I mean why have an argument if you agree with me!

So lastnight he went to be and fell asleap and nothing has been said, He leaves at 5.30am and normally gives me a big cuddle and a kiss, well I only got two kisses on the forhead today. I couldn't go back to sleep so up I got.

I know my tears are hormonal and I know in the end it is up to me. But gease his timing for his own mood swings is awful, I feel like telling him to smoke! but I really want him to quit! good for him and the future, after all I am clubsy and I dont' need an oxygen lead all over the house. when I did age care I'd always step on them (not on purpose).

Anyways now I'm being silly. But I do feel like I've had a win, I am putting me and Squeak first.

[barney]

oh green you poor chicky babe stress is just what you dont need hun i hope dh is better by this arvo and things all work out as for the smoking my dh does as well and omg i could not imagine him giving up eva he luves his smokes lol.dont cry hun its gonna work out

[kyrawolfe]

hey all

grnslw-=- sorry to hear you had a crappy night feeling out of sorts with DF. Its never fun to feel like your not on the same page, and your right the hormones certainly wouldnt be makeing things feel a whole lot better ..

at least he is agreeing with you in the long term and gave you kisses this morning.

I had a bit of a blow out last night myself. I was fine when I went to bed, other then my stretched feeling belly.. But at 12am our son woke up and started crying (usually we handle that really well, Also most of the time our lil boy is quite easy to settle )But every now and again it is really impossible to do the right thing.

Last night was one of those times, Hubby went in first to let me stay in bed and get some sleep, but of course i was awake (no mum can sleep when there baby is crying) and I heard hubby softly asking boo what was wrong but the crying just got louder, and he sat down and went to cuddle him and got smacked and screamed at and then mroe crying... everytime he did anything DS just got more stressed

So at this point I got up to help and walked into DS screaming and Hubby looking extremely stressed out and confused.. I figured maybe he just needed someone there to cuddle him or be there for when he was ready to calm down enough to talk so i sat down and said "ill take him" to hubby who being high strung took this as "you cant do it let me do it" and stormed out into the lounge room..
I sat with him and cuddled him but the screaming just continued nothing helped it just made him kick and yell and cry more

It gets really hard at times because no matter what we do it seems wrong.. So i asked him one more time after leaving the room a couple times hopeing that would calm him down (it didnt) if he needed to go toilet, and he finealy said ok, and took my hand but as soon as we got to the toilet it got more tricky

( sometimes he wants help to get his pants down and others he wants to do it himself, the safest bet is to usually give him a chance to do it himself) so i did, but he got upset and cried more, so i tried to help him and he screamed NOOO and sat down tantruming and wet himself..

it took us an hour of trying to get him to take his pants off but he just would not let us near him no matter how we approached him..(by this stage me and DH were bickering alot.. because we were both trying to handle it with our own ideas.. which would have just been makeing things worse, but again.. even b4 this started we couldnt do anything right.. it just wasnt our night lol.)

so there we were 1:30am with a 2 y o son on the floor of the toilet screaming with wet pants and not letting us near him.. after another 30 minutes we fineally got him dressed and Hubby got him back in bed because i was two straws off losing my mind with frustration.. So after that I just got dressed, said not a word to hubby or boo, stormed out of the house with the car keys ready to drive around the block.. Hubby stopped me and asked me if i could please sit on the verandah instead because i was in no way to drive.. So I did.. And surprised myself by all at once losing the anger and replacing it with wailing like a baby myself on our back verandah.. I never ended up loseing it at either of them but i certainly lost it with myself.. Theres nothing worse then feeling so useless you cant even read your own child..

hubby was so good.. he calmed down in the bedroom and fineally came out and wrapped his arms around me and we had a big talk about it all.. Me more blubbering out half recognisable sentences about "why cant I just know what to do with my own son?" etc etc But he made me feel alot better and i fineally calm down enough to realise that there was no way anyone was going to make him feel better until he was ready.. Hes 2 and he was tired and confused.. enuff said

I went in to his room after all this and said i was sorry to him in his sleep for not helping enough, and even in his sleep he said to me "ok mummy" without even opening his eyes :'(

just thought if anyone is feeling stressed it might help read this.. Because it always helps me to know im not the only one that gets overwhealmed with these things.. relationships, any kind, are hard and take alot of work. But with patience and time to let yourself cry when u need to, you can work out even the toughest of times..

Anyway, this morning all is forgotten and forgiven.. Me and hubby had big kisses and cuddles and DS is happily playing and danceing and being his sweet little self. And once again Im sitting by the phone waiting on the call that WILL get me this house LOL...

Hope to hear from you all soon - btw i WILL do more persies once i learn a lil more bout everyone else

Ky

[airline]

wow kyra...what an exhausting, emotional night. you might want to nap today!! sometimes we need to go through the different cycles of emotion to get through whatever has been placed in our way. It all ended well, with DH and DS understanding you and you and DH understanding DS.

green - good for you girl, stick to your guns, and good for him trying.

afm - just popping in to say ironically yesterday I started feeling queasy on and off all day yesterday. same thing today...i've made sure i've eaten small and often (just the way i like it), i've drunk lots of water and even bought a ginger beer as doc. said yesterday it's good for nausea. I've not been sick, i just feel constantly 'queasy' - best way to describe. That's gotta be a good thing hey? I also did some research on normal hcg levels and no heartbeat, and there are a lot of stories online where people know they're 6/7 weeks and the sonographer says 5/6 weeks and no heartbeat, and then at the second scan all good. Not sure if there's been enough time between Mon and today but gonna ask FS for a transvaginal scan today. We're so united on desperately wanting this little splodge, we've bided our time...surely it's our turn.

[kyrawolfe]

Airline-=-

Yes it does all work out in the end.. I wouldnt have a good story if it had never happened

Try not to stress too much at this point (i know, easier said than done) Me and DH did the same thing with this one, especially afetr loseing 2 bubs it makes it really hard to trust things are ok.. but as you said.. you may only be 6 weeks and thats perfectly normal for them not to find a hb just yet give it another week b4 you start to wry yourself too much.. I really hope it works out fine

[LondonMiss]

oooh airline - sickness is good!!!

i highly recommend sugar free super cold Solo, lemon squash, and for emergencies, crystallised ginger if you are really quesey (get it at a health food shop). Does the trick immediately for me. I have to say the only day last week where I wasn'tfull of MS (or all day sickness) was a day I had very hot dhal makhani curry for lunch and red thai curry for dinner, so I'm not sure about the rule about avoiding spicy stuff!

[LondonMiss]

ps. I was 6 weeks and four days yesterday. Why is my ticker not showing 6 weeks and 5 days????

[mitf]

Hi Ladies,

I have been lurking but not posting due to time constraints. So much has happened so I will just comment on the last page or so.

Airline - I am sorry to hear that your scan didn't go quiet to plan. So glad to hear that the results of your BT were good and fingers crossed your little one catches up quickly.

Bella - Good luck. Looking forward to hearing your news.

Grub - not long till DH is home. I hope you are enjoying counting down those final days.

Smithy - hope your hormones have settled down and you are felling less teary.

Greenslw - I agree with the other ladies. It is a bit rich that the MIL asked you to pay half her flight. Surely she should understand that you have a lot of expenses with the baby. My in-laws live interstate too. They certainly won't be welcome to stay for at least 2 weeks. I really want DH, I & the bub to have our special time at first.

Kyra - I am still quiet new here myself but welcome. Good luck with the house hunting, although I don't envy you having to move and unpack while pregnant. Sounds like you had an emotional and draining evening. It sounds like you and DH handled it as best you could under the circumstances.

LM - there is nothing more beautiful than having a new born baby sleep in your arms. Glad to hear that DH saw that beauty.

AFM - we had our first scan at 7w3d last week. The baby was spot on for size and the heartbeat was 157. It was quiet an amazing experience. We have been trying to get pregnant for so long it is still hard to believe we are here and finally getting to experience it all. DH was very sweet and so excited to see the heartbeat. He said he can't wait till the next US. Luckily I am still not really having many symptoms. I feel a little nauseous at times but MS has remained at bay. We have told a few family members and close friends we are expecting and I am bursting to tell the rest of the world. We have agreed to wait till 10 weeks and will then start telling people through December when we attend Christmas parties and things.

Mitf xo

[grub17]

hi kyrawolfe - haven't welcomed you to the forum yet! I smiled when you said you and DH had big time snuggles and DS was dancing...

lm - i think there's ticker ''issues''. hope you are well.

airline - i was quesy from 6 to 14 weeks and the only thing that helped me was blackmores morning sick tablets. DH made some ginger and lemon tea for me too, that helped, I never actually threw up, just had really bad nausea.

greenslw - good for putting you and squeak first. and DF sounds like he's getting on the band wagon too... but you know what blokes are like ... bit slow n all. lol. DH and I had a blow up yelling fight a few months ago when his parrot wouldn't stop screaming and it drove me nuts, i asked him repeatedly to shut her up and he just ignored me... so i absooutely irrationally blew my top. anyhoo, it all ended with me in the bedroom ballng my eyes out and DH condescendingly telling me "i should have know better with all your hormones'' lol. Didn't have the energy to be mad at THAT comment, he was trying. MEN!

Hi smithy!

murph - i was going to make a crass crack about those knockers... but played nice (i must have been feeling unwell) lol.

AFM had doc appointment today. bub is engaged and definitely pressing down as i feel very different and am getting quite a few twinges. So hopefully this is all binding well for an early Dec arrival... as soon as his daddy steps through the door. Feel very tired but laid down and sleep wouldn't come... fortunately i got MORE kids paint-by-numbers canvases lol... so that's 10 now! hheehheee. poor DH will come home to a house covered in poorly painted children's art. lol. But hey, it keeps me occupied!

must go.. have a sooky furbaby requiring cuddles (on the lounge too boot, don't tell DH). Home in 9 days!!!! Someone mentioned their labrador furbaby getting a tick - is she feeling better??? (sorry can't remember who it was, had a look but couldn't find it again)... The best thing for paralysis ticks is dip... don't touch the tick, just put a few dabs of the dip on the tick and let it die. It'll shrivel up, dry out and will just pull off really easily.

[grub17]

MIFT !!! what a lovely christmas gift to give your family and friends!. and congrats on the scan! But don't bother trying to 'get used to it' cos it won't happen. lol. I'm the size of the house and am STILL only half convinced a real baby is coming out and i just haven't been hitting the snikers too hard.
ox

[LondonMiss]

mitf - how lovely to hear from you. We're planning on doing the same thing. We'll have to do a lot of our "telling" on skype and the telephone. DH and I are running a book on who squarks the loudest and who cries the most.

Told my colleague today and she got tears in her eyes which of course nearly set me off... I only told her because she's sat right next to me and was about to light up!

[TaRhLi.]

Hi everyone

Just popping in to see how you are all going, and more newbies to fill up the spaces vacated by us recent mummies... How exciting.

Just wanted to recommend a good book for you all, especially our first time mummies to be. It is called the "Wonder Weeks" and is available via the Belly Belly store, I had a shocking week with Tara last week being very clingy, whingy and not wanting to sleep and was recommended this book by one of the mum's in the parents forum. It arrived today and it described perfectly what Tara was going through, it is all to do with the mental development stages our babies go through at certain ages (with the first one being 5 weeks). I just wish I had it before she arrived so then I would have been prepared and not thinking I was doing something wrong or going crazy with the crying.

So at the next change at 8 weeks, I'll now be prepared for what to expect instead of running blind.

Hope you all all cooking along nicely and it seems that Grub may be joining the mummy club soon (although keep those legs crossed until DH gets home)....