sorry just another quick cry for me..

Jelly bean was due today.. still nothing

I am constantly in pain with BH and other weird contractions

I havnt had my car for 4 weeks
I havnt had a break from DS in 3 weeks cuz we pulled him out of kindy till I have baby so he doesnt bring home a cold
Im having my first thursday night without my usual dinner with my gf and her kids..
I havnt been to the shops for 2 weeks
Im scared to go anywhere incase my waters break and Ive stopped controlling the budget and spendings because I dnt have it in me anymore and now I feel completely lost with our money and spending..

I feel completely disabled and depressed and i cant believe Im still here..

I know I sound like a whinger because technically Its only JUST my due date today but I guess I just didnt see myself going this far because its my second and I had had DS 4 days ago now in comparison! its already been so much waiting for this one and I know at worst they will induce me 10 days from now but 10 days to me atm feels like 10 years..

Sorry for the rant again hope everyone is doing well.. Ill read up a bit better later and do persies I promise..
Ky