Thank you all for the support! Its awesome just to know that other people feel or have felt the same way, and that because I have these feelings it doesnt automatically mean I am somehow cut out to be a bad mum. Most of the time I am positive and happy about Bean's arrival, but then sometimes I just wig out- especially when tired and hormonal! I think for me, as long as I recognise that its normal and ok to have those feelings, I can kind of deal with them and they pass in their own good time. Its so great to have these forums where we can just blurt it all out and process it and get support- thank you all!! It takes me ages to deal with change, and this helps enormously.

Mel, you make a good point about how it can be really hard for our husbands, and I will need to watch out for that. He's been so good about supporting me, I wonder how he will deal himself! I'm glad to be aware of it so I can look for ways to support him. He is really keen on doing at least one feed as well, he keeps asking about it, its so cute!