If it weren't for contraception no-one would EVER have perky boobs - the minute you got into puberty and started DingTD you'd be up the duff - BAM! You'd have mother's breasts when you had your first bubs at 15 or 16 and never even consider that they should be perky. In a way it's pretty unnatural really, if you think of it like that.
I find exercise makes a massive difference to me. I have a DP (he doesn't live with me, so i'm semi-single - a single parent, but not single, if that makes sense) and am thinner than i've been since the age of 17 and certainly fitter than i've ever been, but i still have extra belly skin, wobbly love handles, big thighs, saggy (and HOW!) boobies. Yesterday i got up at 8am (DD was at her daddy's house), went for a 7.5k run, then went and swam 0.5k using only my arms, then walked 6k all over the city doing various errands. Sure it's not how it was when i was 15, but i'm not sure how much more i could reasonably expect of my body, you know?
Even if i'm having a fat day i feel way better after exercise. Running made a difference to me, but i took up bodypump and wow, even though i only do it once a week i sure did begin to get visible results after a few months! Before i exercised regularly it seemed like too much hassle but now you could NEVER NEVER NEVER get me to give it up!
I felt the same way. That no one would want me now my body had changed so much. I am a 18G in my bra's and when i start breast feeding again i'm sure i'll need the F cup size. Whilst Preg the first time i gained 22kg and have never been able to shed to much of that. Stretch marks gailor on my stomach thighs and upper arms. It was like i longed for male company even though they had hrt me so much in the past. So when i did meet this guy i fell for him right away. Fell pregnant 3 months later then he left me. I knew my life was to good to be true. So my warning would be make sure it's love not lust and that the man feels the same way. Although it feels great to be wanted i made the mistake of not reading between the lines. He didn't want me just the family i could give him so now starts the custody battle . PS my boob's look great in a bra but very disappointed in what they look like when i take it off .
miranda,
definately a valid point there, thats why i'll be investing in lots and lots of contraception when i eventually get back into the dating scene...
how old is your second? if you're still breastfeeding then you've got some leverage on him, no judge will take away a breastfeeding baby from its mother... and even if you're not, how will they ever know??
yeah i look pretty good in a bra too! until i take it off then it's flabby abby i tells ya!
to be honest, i wont be trusting men for a very long time i think... it was hard enough for me to trust a man before i had bubs, and now that i'm a mother theres NO WAY IN HELL any man is going near him or me for that matter, until i can see he's genuine...
us women gotta protect ourselves!
Hi there i have two son's aged 2 and 4 i breast fed till they were 14months i weaned the first because i fell with the second and weaned the second to get him out of my bed lol he liked his boobies on demand night and day. I got fed up with him latching on by himself through the night. I am now 28 weeks with the third and another boy!! The father is threatning that he has full coustody from birth and i can travel the 4 hours north for the 1 -3 hours visitation. lol What a load off bull s***t in his dreams. He calls me his incubator. That's all he wanted from me was a child. My ex husband the father of my other two is gay i found out with him cheating on me with another man. I was so devo. So yes no trust left for men at all!!!! It also get's me mad when i did go to the pub to play pool with my family i got comments like "at least we now she puts out boys" My dad ended up in a brawl with us all having to leave. So now i stay at home unless i have to go to antenatal check up's or to do things with my boy's like the park where i do meet other mums and single mums which is great.
what i would suggest you do is cut contact with this a$$hole, change your number, change your address, and don't tell him when the baby is born and definately DO NOT put him on the birth certificate.
oh and as for him thinking he will get custody from birth, um i'm thinking maybe he's got a few too many birds on his antena! my ex tried to threaten me with **** like that too, he said he would get a court order to be present at the birth! YEAH RIGHT, like anyone in their right mind would give that right to any man! even a man judge wouldnt let him do that!
but yeah, i cut contact with the ex when i was 5 months pregnant and i'm tellin ya it was the best damn decision i ever made, i never changed my number tho, i moved interstate(which he already knew about) but he didnt know exactly where i was going so he'll never be able to find me, and as for my phone number, i just ignored all his calls and messages and eventually he just gave up because he had no other way of contacting me.
i just hope for your sake that this guy comes to his senses and realises that its YOUR baby, not his. a mother will always have more rights than a father, i have a lot of family friends etc who were very decent men and still had trouble getting any kind of custody of their children, in one case, my friend's ex wife was a complete nutcase, and it had been proven in court, and she still got custody of his son! so if that helps, i'm pretty sure you're not phsyco, and you're capable of taking car of a child (duh), so no judge will take you're son off you.
and if you can, dont put his name on the birth certificate because technically, if he's not named as the father, then he has absolutely NO RIGHTS to you or your child whatsoever, and that'll make it so much harder for him which is what we want! make him cry!
oh and as for those w@nkers in the pub, go shove the pool cue up their a$$! or if thats not possible then just walk up to one of them, smile and punch him in the nose! that always gets my point across
oh oh oh and another thing, WRITE EVERYTHING DOWN! when it comes to court, and you have recorded everything he's said and threatened and done, and he has just 'his word', guess who's gonna look like a fool!
i'd give you my lawyer's number, she's the top female divorce lawyer in queensland and hates men... good combination hey... but she lives on the sunshine coast... bit far from you i think!
seriously tho, write down all these stupid things he's saying, because in the long run, the more he threatens you, the more unstable he will appear to a judge... trust me
and you must keep me posted on your journey from now on!
us women gotta stick together...
it'll turn out ok, you watch, karma will come back and bite him on the a$$ big time
You got alot of good points there. But i still can't help worrying till this is all over. I live near Mackay NQ and i have the best lawyer in town everybody just hates her unless you got her on your side cost a packet but it's all worth it. Both my ex's hate hearing her name mentioned when we have a disagreement. I got diaries on both men to they do say alot of stuff i also include emails which i print out, chat coversations on msn and i can print out text messages on my mobile to so they are just writting their own bullet's which i'll use in court if i have to.
I just not quite sure on what to do about the birth cert because in looked it up through the births deaths and marriages site and they say he can go to court to put his name on it and get his parental rights. I would like my son to know his father and get to spend time with him just not to much to fast. And i don't want to look like i slept around and don't know who my babies daddy is. But i'll ask my solicitor when i go in next what would be best. I am going to mediation before the baby is born and having the birth written into the orders. I think if we didn't come to an agreement and we had to go to court it would take months to acually get to court because of the waiting list people i have spoke to up here said they waited 18 months.
I still email the dad and give him small updates on the baby after i've been to antenatal appointments this was his request and i have done it for him but he still not happy if he reply's he just wants more info and that would mean telling him about my body and what i'm going through so i refuse that. I even email him the scan photo's because i have a heap of them, i let him come to the 18week scan to find out the sex of baby as soon as we walked out of the room he started in to me over his name, I picked out Brodie John for a boy and Claire Grace for a girl he hated them. Just something else he wishes to take me to court about he say's it his baby and he'll have the custody so he gets to choose the name. (Oh i am a country person lived in the bush most my life now in a little town that's why the country names my other boys are called Clayton and Travis)
Anyway i think i have been more than fair with this man and he just likes to stress me out. This male should be avoided like the plague. lol !!!!
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. PS my boob's look great in a bra but very disappointed in what they look like when i take it off 
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