Thank you both so much for your comments. They were really helpful. It's just good to get an opinion from someone on the outside who's not involved or judgemental. I'm lucky to have had some supportive friends who I have told and they said if I need anything let them know and just that they hoped bio dad would step up.
At the moment XP is helping which is good because thats who my baby has grown up with all this time. I have put it to bio Dad that the idea of this whole thing is to figure out whats in the best interests of the 2 year old and also just reminded him that when he does have kids with his partner that he hasnt gone through most of the important stuff and it will be their first time so my son shouldnt take away from that. I really will be trying to advocate for something like keeping in contact a few times a year for my sons sake as I have explained to him I will have some explaining to do one day and I want to be honest with my son so that when he's a teenager or an adult he feels he can still come to me with things rather then hide them from me. I've been trying to do reading.etc. on the subject and one thing they did mention with being a single mother is how to answer the dad questions and I really dont want to be telling my son about that myself as I feel that will be just my side of the story but we'll see how things go.
Thank you so much
Mel
xox