Reply With Quotehun, i have no answers but i couldn't read and not post.
I assume it's 'normal' to feel this way.
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How do I accept this?
I'm scared our next baby is going to be a girl. I know I should be happy to have a healthy living baby but I want a boy. I have a room full of brand new boy things that I want to use. I don't want a girl. I feel so horrible admitting it. How do I accept a baby girl?
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I assume it's 'normal' to feel this way.
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i have nothing to offer except
did you 'try' a particular way or time when you fell pregnant with Jack? is there anyway you could try that way again? find out when you O and just try really hard for another boy?? im sorry hun, i know it's really hard
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Yeh we used shettles and it worked, same as when we tried for iz so we'll do it again, but I know it's not a gurantee
I don't know because I feel the same way :/ I want a girl, if I had a boy I'd be happy but yeah hard to explain
BellyBelly Member
i will mesage you when i have a frre hand..( well 2 hands lol) We lost our little girl then had a boy. so i have a bit of an understanding.
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I dont know. I think it just takes time to process.
I think I want a girl this time, because I get upset about baby boys. On the other hand, I'd love to have the opportunity to raise a live healthy boy and I'd be sad if we never had another son. Mostly, I just want a healthy, take home baby.
I dont know if you're getting counselling but if you are maybe bring it up there. It might also help you to adjust to find out the sex as early as you can so you get used to it before baby arrives.
2014 BellyBelly RAK Recipient.
Skybie, when I lost Josh I was secretly hoping I'd have another boy as I felt I wanted another chance at having a wee man iykwim. For you it might be that and maybe the fact that you have two girls and would like a boy, bot it's just so hard to get over that feeling and accept that whatever you end up having you'll be happy. Of course you will be, but I know that longing to have the same gender as last time. It seems the shettled method worked for you so can't see why it wouldn't again. Now that I have Cam, I'd be happy with either for my next one (I hope to God there will be a next one) , but if Cam ended up being a girl, I would definitely try again until I had a boy (except I'd probably end up running out of time! lol). GL sweetie!
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I feel so bad admitting this. But our next baby will be our last and we want a boy so so much. Guess we just have to hope that the universe is kind to us. I'm glad I'm not the only one who's felt like this
Hun i had 3 boys before i lost my 1st daughter and i was devastated that i would never have a girl when i was pregnant again deep down i was desperate for a girl i dont know why maybe to heal the pain not a replacement for abbi but a girl to just make it feel like we finished what we started before in the end i was so worried and stressed that something would go wrong i just said to whoever it is that decides our fate that i would be happy with a healthy baby no matter what and i was ok with that.
If you do have another girl you will love her just the same the minute you look into their little face you fall in love with them.
I hope all goes well with your next pregnancy.
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of course you're not hun, not by a long shot.......it's hard when we feel this way, we can't change or explain why we feel this way, but we do....i hope, really really hope that you get the little boy you long for. I think Ferrals said it right, not that you would have a replacement for Jack, but that it would help heal you, it would heal you to have another boy.
i feel that way about having another baby....just after what happened, i feel like i can't end that way, having another baby would be healing for me.....i think because i already have a pigeon pair, though, im not too strssed about having a particular sex (although i totally understand the need for that sex) but just....in fact for me, it's the opposite. i almost want another girl because i would find it hard to look into another baby boy, but i know its different for everyone.....
just to ask, what's the shettles method??? sorry,im a bit clueless with things like that. but i hope it works for you again this time round xoxoxox
HUGE hugs hunni I understand the feeling all too well DD1 I sort of coped with being a girl as she was my safety rock in a violent relationship but DD2 completely different story. Probably not what you want to hear but I was a mess I emotionally detached from the pregnancy after the scan didn't even want to look at her after birth touch her anything she wasn't a boy
I needed a boy to "replace" (**** choice of wording but hopefully you understand) Anthony. It took a good few months after birth to be "comfortable" with her.
But now I'm a mess again being boys I'm scared of everything going wrong as that's what happens when I have boys now look at me hooked up to machines in hospital!
I'm sorry I can't be of any help I can only tell you my experiences but I am here to talk whenever you need I've been there and know how hard it is and find it rewarding to help others through it too
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Thanks girls. I think it will be a matter of love at first sight. I almost don't want to find out the sex before its born incase it is a girl. So then when it's born we're so wrapped up in the fact that we have this beautiful living baby it doesn't matter what the sex is ITMS? But then on the other hand I know I won't be able to wait that long to find out.
MD shettles is to do with timing and positions. If u want more info pm me and I'll tell you about it
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i think the most important thing is that you know its safe here to be open and honest with your feelings. This has got to help when most people IRL will just expect you to be perfectly happy with either sex and infact probably want you to forget or atleast not want to talk about Jack anymore.
If it helps we werent 'trying' for a boy but DS was conceived right on O whereas all the other pregnancies have been whenever in my cycle!
Hugs hun.
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Understand completely.
I had such a war with myself before and during the pregnancy.
It's so weird cos with Milana, I had already had a run of girls (now 8, 6 and 4) that I wanted a boy, then when I had a girl then lost her I wanted another baby girl so much.
I have now had my little bouncing bubba boy, and to be honest I am so happy. I am not looking back and thinking what if, or jealous over other people and there baby girls. This for me is my last bub as well and I am just happy he is here safe and well.
Before I had him, I did have a problem with baby girls, now I don't.
I spoke to my psychologist about my feelings and it helped.
Thinking of you,
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just to give you an idea of my feelings, the whole time i was pregnant with J, i knew he was a boy i just had this feeling, and i was warring with myself because i really wanted a girl. now that i lost him, i feel so terrible in myself, that i wasn't 'happy' he was a boy, cause i would give anything, ANYTHING, to have my little boy back, and i just feel so bad for feeling that way, because he was taken from me like that.......does that make sense?
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Makes perfect sense hunny. I'm not on my comp so I cant send smileys but I'm sending u super massive hugs right now. I wish we lived closer. I had a misscarriage the cycle before jack was conceived and convinced myself I lost that bub because it was a girl and I wanted a boy so desperatly
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I Feel EXACTLY the same. I have so much boy stuff. I was mentally prepared for a BOY.. DP wanted a son ... i dont think i could cope with a girl...
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