Hi everyone,
My 9 month old was going quite well with her sleep, then got sick and has gone so far backwards its not funny. She currently will not go to sleep at all unless she is BF to sleep, and now its getting so bad that as soon as I try to put her in bed she wakes, wanting boob again. It doesnt really worry me feeding her to sleep if she will stay asleep, but I'm going to have to go back to work soon and she will be in day care... how on earth will they get her to sleep there???
Any suggestions on some gentle techniques would be appreciated, as I dont want to CC.
Does she ever hav a dummy? I wouldn't introduce one now though.
Do you still wrap? Does she have anything for comfort??
DS will usually have a feed before sleep, but is ususally still awake when I put him down. I did a bit of CC though.
It does work. I never let him winge for more than 5 minutes, but after about a week he goes down fine. Don't worry, I understand its not for you.
We wrap, then put him down, with his dummy if he's really tired, but usually just wrapping him firmly is enough now. If he's having a good day he'll be asleep in 5 - 10 minutes.
If he is having a bad day & won't sleep I do rock him to sleep, but unless he is really upset, I'll try not to feed him.
bjrose - she doesnt have a dummy, have tried giving her one and she just plays with it. She puts it between her gums and pulls it in and out of her mouth.
She is still wrapped too.. have read about giving them a comfort object for bed, but not really sure what to give her, as she puts everything in her mouth, and the SIDS side of things worries me there
We've just recently stopped wrapping DS and I gave him a soft toy to cuddle to sleep. I know what you mean about the SIDS risk, but I figured he was mobile enough for it not to be such an issue. It has worked well for us. He also has a dummy but not sure how much it helps him to sleep and he doesn't have it overnight, only during his day naps. Once he is over this cold, I'm thinking about getting rid of it all together. If I were you, I would avoid using one, but if its going to give her the comfort of sucking without needing to feed to sleep, then in that situation it may be the lesser of two 'evils'??
You said that she had improved prior to getting sick - why don't you just try going back to square one, doing whatever you originally did to get her to the point where she didn't need to feed to sleep?
The other thing that comes to mind is that I've seen people post about some sort of technique in the No Cry book about getting babies over the need to feed to sleep - might be worth looking at? I can't help in more detail on that one because DS has never fed to sleep.
Alot of other mums on here are using cloth nappies for comforters.
If you try putting it down your shirt first so it smells like you it might work.
It's not going to be easy though. I think if you just keep to the routine of wrapping, putting her down & giving her the comforter.
Maybe you coult try patting & shushing for a while. If she gets upset pick her up & rock til she settles.
If she settles try the patting & shushing again & use feeding as a last resort.
I have had alot of times where the only way is to feed. He just gets upset & ends up screaming. I can't let him cry. Winging I can handle, but not for long. Crying I can't do.
You'll probably find it won't be a problem at childcare, they'll find a way to get her to sleep.
DS still feeds to sleep at times (at nearly 2, I know). He started childcare at 11 months and was patted to sleep there, no problem - he still won't put up with being patted to sleep at home.
Maybe talk to the chilcare centre and ask what they do to get the babies to sleep?
Willow - the strange thing is, I never really did anything... she kind of got sleepy on the boob, then would unattach herself and just drift off. Now if I unattach her when she is awake, its the end of the world in her opinion!! Maybe I just need to keep trying till she figures out it isnt that bad
bjrose - thanks for the tips, will give it a try
Snowy love - thats good to know, I havent actually chosen a centre yet, but maybe thats one of the things I will ask when I go looking from now on. I just hate it when they tell me that I've created a bad habit! everyone I talk to outside of BB thinks its my own fault, this is the only place people seem to understand!
I have had the same problem lately, MJ has been sick and as she is not feeding for as long (snotty nose) i was getting suckkered into thinking that she was still hungry, where as she just would have a couple of sucks and fall off to sleep.
I found that 'rocking' as such didnt work, but sort of bouncing her lightly was more effective, also i would hold her in the position of BF and let her suck her fingers, usually she would drop off to sleep.
Now the fun part, putting her down.
At night time i heat up a wheat bag and put that in her bed prior to putting her down, i think that she was waking due to the temp shift from being held to being put in a cold bed, so if i warmed the bed, she was less likely to wake.
During the day, i would gradually put her down, shill bouncing her lightly but slowly move her away from my body, each time she would grizzle a little i would shush shush her and bounce a little ore then once she is quiet move her a bit more.
Gradually we would get down to the bed with my hands still under her, i would slowly move my hands out, each time she would stir i would stop and resettle her on the spot, the start mving the hands out again.
I found i could get the hand from under her back, if i still lightly bounced her from her bottom (so i would leave that hand til last.
Hope this makes sense and tat it can be of help
Good luck
Oh i should add, sometimes i do just feed her again, IMO who am i to chose that she is not hungry still iykwim
Kellie, it might be different when you are not there for her to have a bf. Certainly carers are very good at finding ways to get problem sleepers to sleep. Some of the ones at our centre can even get my stubborn 3yo to sleep and that is an achievement!!
In terms of comforters, you would be surprised at what works. DS1 used to like having his head covered by the sheet. DS2 uses his sheet, or any similar feeling cloth like a pillow case. This even soothes his tanties! So maybe some trial and error. But again, for you, some of these things might not work as you have milk, but if they work for others that is main thing for now. GL.
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Pls help - bub still wants to be fed to sleep
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