I definitely feel relief when I consider the guarentee of no more. Dont get me wrong, I love my children and dont begrudge the investment in their infanthood at all but Im at over 4yrs breastfeeding with probably another 1-2 to go, Ive coslept with one swapped into the other, I feel like Ive given a lot of myself and energy towards them. Im pretty ready to move forward from those things and the older DD2 gets the more the idea of another and heading back into the trenches leaves me cold lol. I love where my DD1 is at for example, I know it still requires a lot of time and energy but it is different and feels more mutual, more in line with being me. Plus with our plans to homeschool at least for the primary years, two is a lot more managable logistically. Outside of that decision too we fit just right in our house, our car, one parent per child, our current dynamic just seems to work.

I keep thinking if we do want to do more with children we could look at temporary fostering or even possibly adoption. Investing in children already here rather then bringing more into it sits a lot better to me although I know it is a long and involved process. Id also be keen to look into anonymous egg donation and feel the sooner the better, while my eggs are young.

Im confident Im sure but I know DP can be more impulsive and Im sure the lure of ditching condoms is quite strong. I guess all I can do is explain all my concerns for him and trust he knows what he feels just like I know what I feel.