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Thread: Trying to Conceive after Miscarriage or Loss April 2007

  1. #1

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    Default Trying to Conceive after Miscarriage or Loss April 2007

    Hello everyone. I hope the next few months bring a great emptying out of this thread as you each celebrate a BFP.

    If you have any concerns regarding anything within this thread please email/ PM any of the following Moderating/Admin team for this forum (all emails/ PM's are treated equally & confidentially):-

    Cailin: [email protected] Admin
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    Also, don't forget to check out the informative BellyBelly Conception Articles.

    Your old thread can be found here.

  2. #2
    Heybacko Guest

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    Hi everyone

    I have had a really rough weekend (should have had D&C Monday but started naturally Saturday, think I lost the little one down the toilet but couldn't bring myself to look as was waiting for Mark to come home from work and was too scared and horrified - feel really cut up bad about how my angel left. ) Spent the weeknd in hospital bleeding and clotting real bad, huge, huge loss, they were worried about my haemoglobin as it dropped by 33% and they faffed about whether to go a D&C in the middle of the night as were worried I needed a blood transfusion. Went down first thing Tuesday (6 am) and am good, had a superb registrar who had loads of time for me and my worries and fears. Not like the UK at all, they tend to talk at you rather than with you (unless you are very lucky). Good news is, nothing conclusive on the 'losing girls' thing and can TTC as soon as feel ready. Basically he was open and honest and said at 42, eggs will be slightly older and some may not be in such good condition but if we want more children, then we must keep trying and be prepared that 25% of all pregnancies end in m/c because something is wrong. Sounds harsh when I read it back but he was so nice. Real good 'bedside manner'.

    Anyway, on with April and AF!!!

    BekZ and Tinsel - you lucky lucky mares!!!! Well done those DH/DP's!!!!

    Bun - unless you know otherwise and this is so unlike her, your 'friend' sounds way out of order Perhaps (and this is the best case scenario I can think of) she was trying to protect you from how quickly she fell???? (um, not happy about your mum's reaction either - grrrr).

    Satya - feel for you so much, keep your chin up, I'm with you!!

    Sharon - hope the BDing went well (will take that as a 'yes'!!)

    Janeo - if you are about, how about some details on that ring????

    I've missed so much, it's a April already!!!

    Love and to all
    Alex
    xxxxx

  3. #3

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    Happy April girls,

    Heybacko- :hugs: to you. You have had a rough time. But it sounds like they looked after you. It is crazy that when they do come out with the stats that a good % of pg do end in M/C. I remember when my doc told me that I didnt really think it would happen to me. But then it did. So I guess we keep positive.

    Bun- :hugs: to you too. There will be a shining light at the end of the tunnel for you I am sure of it. I would have the same feelings as you in regards to my friend. Keeping that info from such a good friend is just plain old not on. Hang in there. You have gone through the worst.... it can only get better from here.

    Sorry about the lack of personals. I will make it up later this month.

    As for me, my body is crazy. Today is CD21. Temps are 36.1 and have been for a couple of days. Next month I will definately try temping down stairs. This being my first month of temping... my chart looks like the swiss alps. As a matter of interest last night, I took my temp first orally which was 36.2.... I then temped down stairs and it was 36.8. I will try and work out how I can share my ff chart with you! The funny thing is with all the temp changes, I have no idea of when or if I O this month.

    Here is to a happy Easter, April and many more BFP


  4. #4

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    Heybacko - I am so sorry to hear about your rough weekend. Hugs to you and it sounds like you are on the mend already.

    Jen - Temping "downstairs" gives you a higher temp. You can add your Feriilty Friend chart to your signature. Go to FF and then go to Sharing, and there should be a link to your chart that you can copy to your BB signature.

    Well girls, the worry has started, I had some brownish spotting this morning!!!!! Now I have sharp cramps as well. It could be a number of things: like I am not really pg and my hcg levels are still high from D and C 6 wks ago (although I thought hcg stopped O), the spotting is left over stuff from m/c, or I am pg and it is just a small AF type bleed. I guess only time will tell. I am going to go back to doc next week and I might do another hpt over the weekend.

    Hi to everyone else

  5. #5

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    Fingers crossed that it is just some unrelated spotting Bek....xxxx

  6. #6
    Heybacko Guest

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    Jen - I found temping a nightmare, it just didn't work for me! I have since been told that loads of things affect your temp (such as even a small glass of wine - and I have to admit to adoring the NZ Sauv Blanc!!), sleepless or restless night, and stress or worry!!! Now someone tell me how we can get through TTC without the odd glass of wine, sleepless night or worry???

    All my last 4 pregnancies (inc the 2 m/c) I used LH detection sticks, I am not sure what you call them over here but basically they are ovulation dipsticks that pick up the luteinising (sp?) hormone in the wee!! I bought them in tandem with HPTs - bulk!! Need to source southern hemisphere supplies now! They were great and lit up like a christmas tree whenever I was due to 'O'!! Also, they matched up with my mucus really well, a great reassurer!

    BekZ - : I had breakthrough spotting with both my monsters (now aged 2 and 1!!), I think at around 5 weeks pregnant (and with only one of my m/c) so don't panic too much - especially if it is at the time you WOULD have had a period if you're pregnant - I have read and been told by loads of people that spotting is really common in the first 6 weeks (although I know this doesn't help). Try not to get into the obessive wiping phase (says she, having done it EVERY pregnancy) Not only does it cost loads in toilet paper, it 'does your head in' !!!

    Salt - thanks for your kind words, I AM positive today, although floods of tears earlier reading other posts (still a roller-coaster but one I intend to ride out )

    Hope OZ is warmer than NZ today, I think Autumn is on her way ----oooh, just thought, I will soon be trying to conceive a summer baby!!!!! Both my January babies were born in Winter in UK!!!!

    Loads of love
    Alex xxxx

  7. #7

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    Alex we call LH sticks ovulation prediction kits or OPK's. I started using them when TTC last time and it made life so much easier.

    I will try not to let going to the loo and wipping "do my head in". It did last pg and I was such a bundle of stress now I am just thinking what will be will be...I just feel a bit embarrased about announcing my +ve test and now maybe having to withdraw my announcement. Although my BB buddies are the only ppl that I can tell atm.

    Oz, Queensland is a bit cooler in the last week or so. Our days are still 28/29 but our nights are coming down to 16/18. I wanted to avoid a summer baby because I blow up like a wharus in the last tri, but now I don't care, that is what aircon is for hey.

  8. #8
    Heybacko Guest

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    BekZ, there is NOTHING to be embarassed about, this is EXACTLY why we are here and why we can talk like this here when we can't to people IRL - they don't get it (not their fault of course!)

    When I had Joe (my last) and we were TTC, I tested from the day before I was due (actually maybe the day before the day before I was due ) until the day I came on (told you I bought in bulk!!) - I know I will again, this is just me and how I cope (luckily the website I bought sticks from was cheap and reliable!!)

    If I had had this website then, I would have shouted as soon as I saw a +ve, however faint, because I would have known everyone would understand.

    IF (and it is still an IF) you aren't pregnant, we are still here and you are still TTC BUT let's wait and see!

    Crossing everything (coz I can't BD yet!)

    Alex
    xxxx

  9. #9

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    Hi girls,

    BekZ - try not to worry about the spotting (although I know that is easier said than done!), it is probably nothing to worry about, and I reckon that you are def pg and it is not just leftover HCG, as you wouldn't have that much HCG left after this long, and your chart clearly showed O, so you must be pg! I am thinking of you and I sure it will all be ok.

    Alex - what a nightmare weekend, you poor thing. The hosp bit really is so traumatic, and it sounds like you had a pretty terrible experience there. I am glad you had a good registrar, and I am with you on the stats - sometimes it sounds so matter of fact, but in a way it is reassuring to know how likely m/c is, and kind of gives you hope that eventually, it has to work out if you just keep trying! I am glad to hear that you are feeling more positive today, that really is a lot to go through.

    Jen - temping can be pretty confusing at first. Can you link your chart so we can have a squizz? I think it actually doesn't work for some women, so don't be too worried, but I know it is frustrating.

    Leyla & Tinsel - thanks for you kind words. It really is great knowing that I can come here and talk to you girls when no one else understands.

    SP - how are you going? I hope you are having a good time away. I reckon I would TTC too if I had to wait for an OB appointment, esp with long cycles. Waiting is the hardest thing when going through this.

    Satya - how are you going today?

    Well, I am kind of sorting things out with my friend. I ended up telling her how I felt and she has just replied and apologised for not telling me and said that she wanted a pg more for me than for her (she already has 2 girls) and she was hoping I would tell her I was pg and then she could tell me she was too. When my DH told her DH about what had happened with us, she felt she couldn't tell me as she thought she would be rubbing it in my face. She said that she just wants me to not be unhappy anymore and that she will share everything with me for now on . I don't want her to feel she has to tell me things -it is up to her, I am just upset that had lied to me so many times. She could have just not said anything, I knew she was doing a pg test three wks ago, as I gave her some of my tests, and I would never had asked the outcome - it is up to her. But outright lying is different and harder for me to accept. Anyway, she has asked me to come for dinner tonight and I am sure all will be fine. I just wish things didn't have to be so hard. It would so lovely to go through pg together, but I guess yet again it was just not meant to be.

  10. #10

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    Bun - Glad you have started to make up with your friend. Hope you guys have heaps of laughs tonight.

  11. #11

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    Ok,

    Below is my chart. All over the shop I am.....
    I have been taking my temp as soon as I wake up every morning. Will try the downstairs temping next month. If it is going to worry me too much I might ease up on the temping so I don't stress too much.

  12. #12

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    Hi everyone,
    Bun-Glad to hear you have sorted out everything with your friend, although she still did not do the right thing by you in the first place really, but at least it is being sorted out now, this will also help to make you feel a little better as 1 less thing to worry about.
    Alex-Sorry to hear about your loss, we are all here for you though & willing to support you. I feel so much better since I have been chatting in here as there is a lot of support from everyone. You can look forward to lots of BDing now and also easter you can rest up a bit.
    Bekz-Thinking of you now. You need to not stress too much I am sure all will be ok. You need to not be embarrassed, we are your BB friends, don't be embarrassed with us we are here to support you.I was initially worried about when baby would be born but after discussions in here I now just hope for a baby fullstop, I don't mind when.
    Jen-I have just started temping today, I am assuming you eventually get used to the FF chart, that is my biggest worry at the moment. I will keep you posted how I go. I am a little concerned about getting the same time each day but I will try my best. It is all very new to me.
    I now know why I am not pg when i look at my chart it says I should O on the 10.04, from my own "knowledge" I had worked out I would not O until 13.04. So lucky I joined here & you guys helped me with FF and charting, I have been bding at the wrong times how dumb am I. I always thought it would be so easy to pg my o my how foolish am I.

    Herbie

  13. #13

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    Herbie - You crack me up. You better get bdings earlier!!!!! Don't exhaust our DH too much though. The one month you think you'll O on time turns out to be late or some thing.

    Jen - Your chart does look a bit up and down. I think you'll find temping "downstairs" better. Or you could just drop temping for a month and us OPK's instead or you could start doing OPK's as well as temping.

  14. #14

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    OK girls havnt got time to read every post way to many and im at a internet cafe so a bit hard..........

    Well DP proposed in Bairnsdale we were at a cute little old fashioned hotel we went to tea at the downstairs restuarant and we were all alone until just b4 he was going to ask me another couple came in and chatty me and them got talking and we talked all night until we went to bed so poor guy didnt get a chance to ask me then so up we go to bed and he wants to have a spa i was like NAH sooo tired want to go to bed so hopped into my pj's and hopped into bed i was lying there watching the footy and Andrew opens another beer by now he was a little ****ed been downing the drinks very quickly... bit nervous and i didnt even notice LOL...... anyhoo he cmae over a sat next to me and was looking at me funny i was like WHAT??? And he said well and got down on both knees i was like OMG what are you doing!!!!! LOL...... i said your not?? he said yep i am and i think he said will you marry me and i was like omg omg omg are you for real or drunk LOL.... He said no im for real i asked your dad and everything yesterday i said YES YES YES!!!!!!! and that is that we started to ring family and friends couldnt ring alot as it was late but got onto a few special ones.........

    I havnt got a ring yet i have been looking and know what i want think if we dont find it in Melbourne on our way home from holidays we will get it made through a family friend or i know another jeweller so wait and see a soon as i get it ill put my photo site back up and show you all............. oh and we will probably get married late next yr possible Nov so we can have had bubs and i can lose some weight and bubs can be a bit older......

    Ok so on o front pretty sure and FF says i Oed last Thursday havtn had many signs other then tired but been walking everywhere and doing heaps..... So ill be testing when we get home ill be 15 dpo on the 13th April my dad's 50th so going to test then as i didnt get a BFP until 15 last time....

    OK SO CONGRATS TO THOSE BFP'S cant remember who got them sorry......

    HUGE HUGS to those waiting to O in the TWW or if that WItch has shown up.....

    talk to you all next week might get on again later in week wait and see....Oh cant Good friday see whta happens..

  15. #15
    *las* Guest

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    Hey all

    Body is giving me some very weird signals...have never 'O'd' naturally, but I was convinced I am (although OPK's say I'm not), but lots of signs, lots of CM and sharp pains on right hand side, so we BD'd and thought we'd see what happens. So many people tell me you can suddenly become fertile after a m/c, it's been just over 2 weeks, so I guess that would put me about mid cycle of a 35-40 day cycle (which is normal). I know it's too late to use FF, but will do another OPK tomorow and just see what it says then. Otherwise...just keep waiting for AF. Had a free 'ask one question' psychic thing and it told me I was too unsettled and had too many unresolved personal issues to conceive between age 33-38, somewhere between 38-42 I would and it would be a girl....not sure I want it to happen in another 5 years from now

    Alex - what a rough time you've had Hoping you are recoving ok and looking after yourself.

    Jenjams or anyone - didn't even know you could temp downstairs...do you need a different thermometer???

    Bekz - hope the spotting is nothing to worry about, sending you lots of sticky vibes, take it easy!

    Bun - glad you were able to talk to your friend, it's better to be honest than not to be told, makes it easier to deal with. I'd prefer to know!

    Herbie - it's so confusing working our bodies out, good luck and hope you get the right days now!

    Sharon19270 - My friends are aware of my ttc struggles, past m/c's and this one, I've even emailed the few that I haven't heard from to tell them exactly what happened and that I'm ok, and ask how their pregnancies are going....that was over a week ago...it's a bit disheartening when I'm trying to put my emotions aside to be interested in them, but not getting anything in return..kwim???

    Hi to everyone else

  16. #16

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    Oh Jane, you sound so excited. I am excited for you. I was reading your post at a thousand miles an hour coz I could imagine that's how you were talking..lol. Have a great 'remainder' of your holiday and can't wait to hear all about it when you get home...xxxx

  17. #17

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    Hi everyone

    Heybacko - what a traumatic few days you've had. I hope all is well with you now. It's really scary TTC in your 40's isn't it? The odds aren't so great but plenty of women our age have no problems..... here's hoping that's you and I the next time we get lucky.

    Bekz - I hope everything is OK with you. We all know how common spotting is early on so hopefully that is all it is.

    Jenjams - I've heard that your temp can be affected by things like viruses and headaches as well so it can be difficult to determine O by that alone. I use maybebaby and have found that to be very reliable, but it doesn't pin point it to a day if that's what you are after.

    Bun - It must have been really difficult for your friend to announce her pg to you. If the shoe were on the other foot how eager would you have been to announce it to her if she were the one having fertility issues? Good friends are hard to come by just forgive her for her lies and understand that she was trying to protect you by doing so. I've been positive again all day today and have managed to discuss my mc with a workmate without any tears so I'm hoping I'm over the hump.

    janeo - great to hear the details of the proposal..... I hope you have many happy years together.

    las - ignore the psychic - most of those services are manned by people with no psychic ability at all - they are just a huge money making business for dishonest people.



    I think I've O'd already. It's 12 days since mc and I thought I should start using my maybebaby tester to see when I may O. I got strong Fernlike structures on Monday (1st day I tested) and again on Tuesday. Today I was back to spots so it looks like I've O'd. I knew my HCG levels had zero'd out from the blood results I got on Sat so I knew it was possible to O but did't expect it that quick - maybe at about 10 days after mc. Lucky for me we've been busy in the bedroom lately so I'm not concerned that I could have missed a chance.

    I'm waiting on hormone tests just in case there is a problem of some kind. I won't get the results of these til the Saturday after Easter due to work commitments and the doc being away over Easter. He thinks I may have PCOS. I was tested years ago for this and was found not to have it, and everything is exactly the same as it was back then so I doubt that it is the case. I guess time will tell.

  18. #18

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    Hi girls
    how is everyone today One more day till the long weekend (although not for me I'm on Night Duty again) hope that easter bunny is bringing lots of CHOCOLATE to all of us and some more bfp's to share around
    Bekz try not to worry too much spotting is really common early on and it turns out to be nothing
    Jane cant wait to see pics of your ring congratulations again
    Heybacko sorry to hear about your lousy weekend are you feeling a bit better yet. Dont be too hard on yourself and expect to feel 100% straight away it sounds like you lost a lot of blood and our bodies cant replace it that quickly. sending huge hugs your way
    SP glad to hear from you again hope you are doing well
    Bun I agree with Satya about your friend not wanting to tell you but she still shouldnt have lied to you about it hopefully you can patch things up soon.
    Jenjams my temping was erratic this month and all over the place but I still had FF pinpoint when I O'd so maybe just persevere for a bit longer and keep BDing in the meantime
    As for me no AF no symptoms no nothing what is happening I am so over this TWW

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