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Thread: Trying to Conceive after Miscarriage or Loss April 2007

  1. #19
    Heybacko Guest

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    Hi everyone

    Hope everyone is getting into the holiday mood - we are off to Tauranga (ie the NZ sub-tropical North!!!!) to stay with friends - hope to come back to loads of great news!!



    BekZ - how you doing?? Any news - hope you are managing to keep sane (I am REALLY bad at times like this and would probably have done about 7 HPTs by now )

    Bun - how did the dinner go with your friend?? (You are a much better person than me, I would still be miffed and still think she was well out of order because she was always going to be caught out with the dates! Unless you are like me and DIRE at maths ) Seriously, think YOU are the better friend for agreeing to the dinner -

    Satya - we WILL get there, I have no doubt - just not sure of what it will take - as my grandad used to say 'if you aren't in it, you can't win it!! (Think he meant the Lotto though!!!!)

    Jen - good luck with the temping, some people swear by it (I swear AT it myself, I just don't get anything that makes any sense!!)

    Las - all psychics are fake, end of..!!! It was probably a computer that did not know it was messing with something so important - what will it's excuse be when you prove it wrong eh????

    Sorry if I have missed anyone, I am fighting with a 2-year old keyboard hijacker at the moment and one of us smells bad (no, it;s not me!!) - obviously ALL the spelling mistakes are down to him!!!

    Love to all and if anyone is due to O this holiday, I myself intend to have a nice G&T and some hot pools, try and keep my positive mood up a little longer

    Alex
    xxxxx

  2. #20

    Join Date
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    OMG you ladies can TALK

    Alex So sorry to hear about your weekend, I can only imagine how you must have felt sitting on the toilet and pretty much knowing what was there, I would have been too scared to look too. Glad you had a great registrar, my Ob told me about the %'s for M/C but the way I look at it, there may be a 20-25% chance of M/C but then there is also a 75-80% chance of going full term. BDing went very well thanks but after getting my coverline yesterday, FF has now taken it away today. Enjoy your time away over easter.
    Jen you will find that temping downstairs will give you a slightly higher temp but I found that mine definitely seemed to even out.
    BekZ I have everything crossed for you that the bleeding is nothing bad and that it is just breakthrough bleed huge to you and try not worry too much.
    Bun how did the dinner go with your friend? hope you managed to sort things out, if it where me though I think I would be letting them know that it will take a while for the trust to come back to where it was before the lies.
    Herbie how long are your cycles normally?
    Jane I was the same as Shan and was reading your post at a hundred miles an hour because that was how I imagined your emotions at the time LOL. Glad to see you got your coverline, if mine comes back tomorrow, you are only 2 days ahead of me so we can be cycle buddies
    Lisa I think that true psycics are very few and far between and wouldn't really take heart to what was said to you. As for your friends avoiding you after you have contacted them must really hurt, some people just don't seem to give a toss about other people's feelings and emotions or it goes into their "too hard" basket because they don't know what to say and how to react, I had a friend who said to me after I had my M/C that "she didn't know what to say except sorry" and I would prefer that rather than someone avoiding me iykwim.
    Satya hope you managed to catch the eggie, I have also heard that it is easier for some women to get pg after a m/c. Good luck, how many DPO are you?
    Sarah when do you think you will test? How many dpo are you as well?
    SP how are things going with you?

    I had a really big temperature dip this morning and FF took my coverline away but after putting in a dodgy temp for tomorrow FF will give it back (go figure) even if the temp is LOWER than what is was today, oh well, will come back later for another chat.

    Sorry to anyone that I may have missed.

  3. #21

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    Hello everyone,

    Sharon-My cycle is normally exactly 28 days. After my d&c AF arrived 27 days later & since then she arrives either a few days B4 28 days or a few after, I can always tell though cause of AF cramps and also sometimes I get a headache or migraine as I am a migraine sufferer(only since my mum died though). Why do you ask?
    Can someone tell me what the FF coverline is please, I know I am not really with it!!!!!!

    I have some news I have not shared yet. I am a smoker & I stopped smoking on the Sunday 25tMarch & have not have one since. DH is also a smoker & he stopped the next day to help me out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Struggling a little sometime though. I know it will be better for me & my hopefully soon to be pg.
    Sorry no personals, am at work will catch up later

    TTFN

    Herbie

  4. #22

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    YAY Sharon i hope so........... HEHE i was in a hurry and thats exactly how i talk all the time............ Im a chatter box hehehe...

  5. #23

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    Herbie I was asking about your cycle length because I thought in a previous post you said that FF said you where going to o on CD 10 but after re-reading you actually said 10.4 and it was only because I thought that you sounded suprised at FF saying you where going to O on CD 10. As for being a smoker, I used to smoke and smoked all through my 1st pgncy and my son ended up with bad asthma, every winter he would be hospitalised for 3-4 days because he wasn't getting enough oxygen (his lips would turn blue, and still my parents think it was a load of bull***t, but that is another story) My dh told me when we where going to start TTC that I had to give up smoking for a year, it wasn't until I witnessed the birth of my niece that I found the strength, it was hard, and there where times I thought I would take it up again (still do sometimes) but after 11 years I am so happy I was able to quit, and I personally feel that giving up has prevented Jordan from becoming an asthmatic too. So Congratulations on giving, I have faith in you, and if I can go cold turkey, then anyone can because I have absolutely zero willpower LOL
    Jane I will be nice to have a cycle buddie, also FF was telling me yesterday that my test date would be Friday 13th so we will both be able to test the same day

  6. #24

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    Hi girls,

    Dinner last night with my friend was ok, but a little hard. We had our DHs there, so didn't really talk about things, but it's ok. I don't feel as comfortable talking to her about things now, though. I am still all over the place - one minute I think everything is ok and we will work out what the problem is and have a beautiful baby eventually, and then a minute later I think it is not possible to have a baby after this - it just seems like it can never happen and I am kidding myself thinking that maybe one day it could. Anyway, there is not much I can do - I have made a specialist appointment for 2 weeks time, where I am going to beg him to find out what is going on and stop telling me it is just bad luck and to try again. There is the cycle monitoring which may show a hormonal cause which can be fixed, or it could be a natural killer cell problem or a uterine problem, and we can have tests and treatment for that. Although I know it is most likely just bad luck, but I am really having trouble accepting that atm.

    Janeo - I am so happy for you - that is so sweet! He sounds lovely, and it will be great for you to have something else to think about, and what better than a wedding!

    Herbie - good on you for stopping smoking!!

    Sharon - FF can be so annoying sometimes! I am always putting in example temps to see what would happen and trying to second guess it, etc... I hope it gives you a clear cover line tomorrow.

    Alex - have a great time away.

    Sarah - how many DPO are you?

    Satya - my dr suspected PCOS too, but I didn't have it. I almost wished that I did as it would be an explanation, and there is treatment, but I def didn't have it. It is good that they are testing for it, anyway.

    Las - don't worry about the psychic. That is disappointing about your friends not getting back to you when you have made the effort to get in touch with them. I know that a lot of people don't know what to say, but even acknowledging that and saying they're sorry is better than not saying anything at all. I had the same issues with most of my friends after my first m/c, which is why hardly anyone IRL knows anything about what we have been going through these last few months. Don't worry, you have us and we always have heaps to say!!

    jenjams - your chart does look a bit confusing. I know that temping doesn't work for everyone, though. Hopefully you will start to see some pattern soon.

    Bekz - how are you going? I saw in another post somewhere else by you something about oestrogen levels and CM. Can too much CM indicate a problem? I get EWCM for 7 days before O which seems an awful lot, and O always seems really delayed. Do you know if this could indicate a problem?

    Hello to everyone else, and happy easter!! I hope the easter bunny brings you all lots of yummy yummy chocolate eggs!

    Bun xx

  7. #25

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    Hi all,

    Sharon 19270 - not sure how many days DPO I am as I don't temp but based on the maybe baby I'm thinking possibly 2 or 3. If I don't catch on again in the next few months I may temp but I am just not wanting to go that way if I can avoid it. Years ago I got very obsessive about TTC so I'm trying to keep things as casual as possible in an effort not to get that way again.

    Herbie - congrats on giving up smoking. Not only is it good for you but it's good for any future pregnancy - better birth weight and less chance of stillbirth. If the new research is correct you could also be saving your future children from heart disease as adults as well as they think that mothers who smoke while pregnant are far more prone to this.

    Bun - try not to be so negative if you can. The power of positive thinking is amazing. Also, just look at the stats - 1 in 3 pgs end in mc. It's not fair that some women have more than their fair share of them but I guess some of us have to make up for those women who never have them at all. Also in this day and age very few women end up with no kids if they go on to have fertility treatment.

    I will probably disappear for a few days now for Easter - not going away but my DF & I have his daughter for the weekend and I will be busy busy being step mum and won't get much chance to log on. I hope the Easter Bunny is very generous to all of you.

  8. #26

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    Just want to pop my head in and wish you girls a very Happy Easter. Enjoy your few extra days off (if you get them) and keep your spirits up...xxxxxxx

  9. #27

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    It's me again,
    Sharon-Because I have just started doing this I am not very good at it, probably never will be, and have confused everyone. Going on my own estimations I would have thought I would O on cd15. I have since checked my chart on FF & FF is saying cd 12. I would also like to add that because I have no flamin idea at all I thought you could not get pg until you had O I was not aware most fertile was 3 days before . I told you all I am hopeless. DH will love it though bding flatout now. Sorry about the confusion on FF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Bun-I am pleased you went to dinner lst night & things were ok. You may find for some time things will be hard as your friend has done the wrong thing by you.She should be understanding in that you find it difficult to chat. She should have thought aout this first
    Alex-Here's wishing you a very safe & happy holiday, can't wait to hear all about it
    Lisa-About the psychic thing I can tell you some useless information! I ahd a reading the day I went to the Dr to confirm I was pg in Sept last year. I thought this will be interesting. She told me I was very fertile at this time & should use all methods of contraception if I did not want to get pg, however if I did get pg there would be no prob & I would breeze through my 3/4 pgs. After i stopped laughing at the fact of me having any more than 2 children I have now realised she fed me a heap of [email protected]#$%. By Nov 14 I was in hospital having a d&c, so much for no probs throughout pg. Don't believe all you hear. I still like going to them though, just take it with a grain of salt.

    Herbie
    Last edited by Herbie; April 5th, 2007 at 01:49 PM.

  10. #28

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    Happy Easter girls... Easter is the time for eggs.... So may it be an omen for us all!

    My temps went up to 36.5 this morning.... But who knows with what I have been having. Wonder when my coverline will appear. If it comes in the next day or so I am not too far behind you Sharon and satya.
    I am frustrated with DP at the moment. He is not helping 100% in the BD department...Wont go to specifics but I am quite annoyed. Especially if I miss the pg boat this month!
    Awesome on giving up the smoking girls. My mum smoked throughout her pregnancy with me. I was born 6 weeks early and I have some eye problems.
    I am a bit sceptical with psychics. Do we believe them or not? Hmmmm it is all in the mind power with what we want to believe.
    Bun- your turn will come... All of our turns will come. So if the stork is listening... Start delivering those packages.

    My easter consists of visiting family and tiling. Some chocolate, some hot x buns....

  11. #29

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    Hi Ladies,

    Wow I checked in here at lunch time there were no posts and now there are so many. I have only just scanned over everyones posts, so I am sorry if I miss some thing.

    Sharon - Bummer about coverline. FF always did that to me, I hope you get it back tomorrow.

    Janeo - Congrates again.

    Bun - Sorry to hear that your meeting did not go that well last night. I am sure you'll mend fences soon. At least you are tracking your cycles atm and there maybe some pattern that the FS can identify. I get heaps of EWCM and before I took Vitex it was really thick and rubbery (so TMI). I think I had "hostile cm". Since taking Vitex this has gone and back to what I call normal. When you do your relaxation try and imagine a little baby growing perfectly in your womb, this will help atrract positive energy and it may relax your body. I believe that when we stress our body does not generate enough nutrients and thus we feel stress and pressure even more. It is like a really bad cycle. Sorry to cr!p on.

    Herbie - Keep going with the non-smoking. I gave up when I was pg with DD and I have never looked back. My DH gave up at Christmas and he is now 4 months smoke free and he feels heaps better.

    I am fine. My temp is still up, but I am not going to test again for a few days. Last I tested all the time and it just stressed me out. I am going to doc next Wednesday but I will probably test before then just to make sure. I really don't feel pg, but I am only 4.2wks.

    Best go because DD is demanding my attention. HAPPY EASTER TO EVERYONE. I will try and pop in tonight and I might be able to reply to more posts.

  12. #30

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    Hi girls
    Back again just had dinner and DD off to bed. I'm dpo13 by FF and nothing happening no AF no symptoms no anything will probably test (again) at work tomorrow cause I can get HPT's there for nix and they are the sensitive ones.
    Herbie good on you for quitting smoking its very hard to do and takes great strength but then trying to be a mum does too so I know you can get there
    On the psychic front I have had two tell me I would have 3 kids and here I am with only 1 so dont believe everything they tell you it is best to just treat it as a bit of fun I think
    Back onto night duty tomorrow so probably wont be back for a few days (unless I have something to share)
    Hav a happy, healthy and safe Easter everyone

  13. #31

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    Bun I think your friendship is just going to take a little time to mend. Hopefully when you see the FS they will listen to you and do what you ask
    satya enjoy your easter weekend.
    *Shan* happy easter to you too.
    Herbie technically "some" sperm may survive for UP TO 5 days but realistically I think they generally only live for 2-3 days, but you can't fall pg AFTER ovulation (you would be very lucky if you did), and you will get the hang of it, I didn't have a clue when I started ttc back in August last year, although there are some days when I still don't think I have a clue
    jenjams hope you get your coverline in the next couple of days.
    BekZ I really do hope that you get a BFP over the easter weekend.
    sarah066 good luck testing tomorrow, sending you lots of

    My easter weekend usually consists of lazing around the house doing as little as possible. We are going up the coast on Sunday to see FIL for the day and I think my parents are coming over on Saturday to say hello, and that is it really. So Happy Easter everyone will be back some time over the long weekend to see what's happening in BB land.

  14. #32

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    Hi everyone,

    I'm new here and have just had my 2nd M/C in 2 months this week. I had decided I didn't want to TTC this month, but DH has convinced me otherwise, so hopefully we'll have a bit more luck this time. I must admit I'm still feeling really down about it all - one M/C I could cope with but 2 has knocked me around more. Life just sucks at the moment!

    I'm seeing my GP about it though this week - I'll try and convince her that it should be looked at now and not after I've had a 3rd M/C - I just don't think I could take that!

    Anyway, I thought I might be able to get a bit of encouragement here. I'm just going to try and relax about it this month and hopefully everything will go OK.

    Look forward to talking to you all

  15. #33

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    Hello Ladies,

    Can't stay long but just wanted to wish everyone a Happy Easter. Am staying with family for the weekend so probably wont have a chance to post much. Hope that everything is going well for you all.

    I am now 17 DPO but still no BFP or AF. Have been getting major AF feelings though so am not holding much hope. Should have arrived today, but maybe tomorrow. Oh well, not much I can do about it I guess!

    love to all

  16. #34
    Heybacko Guest

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    Hi everyone

    Just a very quick one to say hope everyone is doing okay through the Easter break.

    A big welcome to megsmum - you are not alone in having a 2nd m/c in a row, unfortunately there are a few of us about - the girls on BB are incredible, I'm new myself and it really does help having somewhere to talk. I really don't know what I would have done without BB this last week. I had felt quite positive following the D&C, looking forward to TTC, etc, etc but my hormones must have kicked last night and i felt like s**t, very down, very end of the road. Bit better again this morning though so on we go!

    Def. go talk to your GP, even if she is reluctant to investigate, she needs to know how much it is affecting you and exactly what you are going through. Talk her ears off if you have to!! If she doesn't listen and you feel let down, think about finding someone who 'gets it' !

    Sending you , Megsmum, sounds like your DH is a superstar!

    Loads of love to everyone esle, hope some dreams are coming true somewhere
    Alex
    xxxx

  17. #35

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    Hi everyone, I managed to escape miss 4 for a few minutes to log on here.

    Jenjams - whatever you do with your man don't nag him about the BD situation. I was there years ago (on and off over all the years that we tried) and if you bring the subject up it can cause bigger problems on that front. Unfortunately it's one of those things that happens when you are ttc long term. My ex told me once that he felt like he was being treated as a sperm donor. I backed off after that and things got back to normal.

    Bekz - glad to hear everything is going OK. Fingers crossed for a positive blood test when you get to the doctor.

    Leyla - sorry to hear that it looks like AF is on the way.

    Heybacko - I hope today goes much better for you. I have suffered some really overwhelming emotional moments over the last two weeks and I've felt that the only people who seem to understand are women on this site. Our men can support us to a certain extent but they can't know how much the whole experience can affect us.

    Welcome to megsmum. I'm sorry to hear of your losses. Maybe it would be a good idea to take a break for a little while. A third m/c could tip you over the edge emotionally. How far along were you when you lost them?

  18. #36

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    Thanks for the welcomes Alex and satya!

    Alex, sorry to hear you were feeling down last night, but I'm glad to hear you are feeling better today. Some days are crappier than others aren't they? I already feel a bit better though now that I have made the decision to go the GP - the other night DH was hassling me out to go and I wouldn't, so he is glad about it too. I know I'm not that old (just turned 37), but I just can't help but feel the clock is ticking a bit for me. I wish we hadn't waited so long to have kids sometimes!

    satya, I was almost 5 weeks for both of them. So long enough to be looking forward to another pregnancy . I think we'll just see how we go this month - I've got another week before I really have to decide about TTC (its day 5 today)- but I think we will. If we have no luck or heaven forbid another M/C I think a break may be the go then. TTC has just been so much more difficult this time around - when I fell pregnant with DD it was only our 2nd cycle trying and I had absolutely no problems through the pregnancy either. I wish it was like that this time!

    All the best!

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