Hi Sally,
You are not alone here.
I am so sorry to hear of your loss.
Yes it is extremely hard and the emotions your are feeling are completely understandable. I went through and still go through thoses same emotions.
I can assure you some days will be better than others.
My best friend was due 6 weeks before me and my cousin was due 3 weeks before. My bestie actually avoided me till last Thursday as she told me she didn't know what to say. Yet my Cousin came to the hospital to visit me.
It is a very hard situation to be in but try to be honest and open with your friend about your emotions. I am sure she will understand as she is probably a little unsure of what to say or do as well. But remember she is your bestie for a reason!
Give yourself some time to heal. Allow yourself and your partner to grieve as this little person had bought hopes dreams and aspirations for you both.

There are so many lovely ladies in here that offer so much support and advice. Sometimes i just pop in to read and don't post but it has provided me with strength when i needed it.

Take care hun.....My thoughts are with you and your partner.

Em