I have no relevant experience to bring to this, but I do recall something that a lot of mums have said to me, which is this "You think that you could never give any more love than the amoutn you have for your firstborn; it is just so great. But then you have your second in your arms, and it comes. It just comes from somewhere, and all of a sudden there's just so much more love."

If you decide you don't want to go for it, well, that's OK.
But if you do, you'll find the love.

I hope you find the best solution for you. Good luck.