Auntie M

I have tears running down my face as I read your story because the words you are saying I said myself not that long ago. May I say that Yeti, and the meaning is such a wonderful name. There are other women in here who have lost babies my cord accidents, and I am sure that as soon as they see your post they will pop in to offer comfort and support.

I lost my son, my first child also, at 36 weeks 2 days and I didn't see how it was possible for my life to continue. People would be talking to me and I would be in such a dark corner of my mind that their words would simply bounce of me. Nothing made sense.

It hurts really badly, this pain is worse that can be explained in words but know that you are not alone and the grief that you feel is normal. You are doing the right thing, feel what you need to feel now, because if you hide how you are feeling, it will be years down the track and it will creep up and consume you. Grief is a roller coaster, there is no rule book about how to cope with it, but we are here to help you on this journey. One thing I know for sure is that yo u shouldn't feel pressured to be better, unfortunately we will never be better, but a day will come when you find a way to continue and a way to see through this pain. I promise you, that day will come.

For about the first 4 months after I lost my son, I barely made it out of the house. My husband tried to get me out of the house, but I distinctly remember making small goals, like getting up, having a shower and getting in the car. Just getting to the end of the street and back seems like such an acomplishment. I can now function much better and I have just marked my son's 8 month birthday. My DH was the same as yours by the sounds of it, men grieve in different ways. Many of the ladies in here will same thing about their DH. Men seem to want to get back to work, get busy, that is their way of coping. But I think women greive much more openly, we need to communicate how we are feeling as part of the healing process so that is why this forum has basically saved me from losing my mind.

So please please don't put too much pressure on yourself. Take your time, Keep talking, we are all here to listen.

Big :hugs: coming your way.

Lv Spring