I understand the name thing, it isn't a concern here though since DD1 is from a previous relationship I wouldn't want to change my name and leave her out, I'm comfortable with our motley crew of surnames now lol.

Security isn't an issue for me as if somebody wants to leave, a bit more inconvenience in splitting isn't going to stop them and I wouldn't want that to be the reason they stayed, I want them to want to be here. Financially I am better off than he is technically so no need to protect myself legally in that sense.

I'm also more confident in our commitment because of how things all happened, there is his taking on of DD1 completely including continuing to support me in staying at home with her (and then DD2) and now with homeschooling. I can just tell we will work things out rather than ditch because even when we are angry he will hold my hand and treat me with kindness, he cares through any disagreement. We both know things take effort and we put it in, we go to bed together each night, we share interests, we talk and laugh and we somehow managed to instantly blend a family with success (DD2 came along 9 months after meeting). We have similar world views and ideals, we want the same things for our future. He is my best friend and it feels right.

And if he leaves, then I'd be okay... it would suck, it would hurt but I'm strong and capable and enjoy my own company more than most people do (big introvert). I've had a taste of him leaving and it hurt more than anything but I survived. I can't see him doing it again though, we have grown so much (he freaked from the pregnancy) and we are much more open with each other (counseling helped solidify that too). That might all sound so detached but it is more if he ups and leaves he isn't the person I love so I'd be wanting my idea of him not him to return, lost cause basically or if he has some valid reason to leave and does so respectfully then I love him enough to let him go. But we both share the view that love is a verb, it's an action and a choice to invest in it each day so I feel his commitment constantly.

I think leaving out the legal side feels right to us. Just having a symbolic ceremony to celebrate our relationship with others. I am excited, I love him and am proud he is mine! Our relationship has always been so family that it feels nice to be thinking about a day (and holiday) for us.