Fire I applaude you for knowing yourself.
I am like you, happy to give this baby away to anyone who wants to take my mat leave, give them back when they are old enough to interact with me. I feel for my DS as he is copping it due to my inability to deal with the baby stage and the crying!!!!
I'm not so much of a control freak as I like to be able to do things - I don't do sitting around, relaxing very well, which I can't with a squirming, crying baby that needs my attention all the time. I can't even find the time to do ebay listings ATM.
I'd suggest that the way to "just take it all in stride and not be so overwhelmed" is not go with the flow and not have a plan. A little like your labour plan, if you have one then chances are it will be nothing like you planned, if you don't have one, then you aren't so traumatised by what occurs. Like for me - I was absolutely certain that I didn't want a c-section which is why when it happened in an emergency situation I still didn't deal very well with it. If I hadn't needed to be in control of how she was born I could have just taken it in my stride and not been so overwhelmed (IYKWIM). Other than that I am as useless as you with the baby stage.