Babies Born November 2007 #2

[Dragonbub]

Willow - glad to hear sleep school was a success, even though they just reaffirmed what you are doing anyway. It is still nice to have the opportunity to just go over things. I found with Caden to begin with I would stress about "the next time" even if he wasn't happy eg he would go to sleep for an hour, then grizzle until I got him up, even if it was an hour later. I stressed that if I got him up after an hour, it would mean he would only ever sleep for an hour at a time! Silly me, now I know he has a couple of hour sleeps in the day, and one big 3 hour sleep. IKWYM about thinking too far ahead, but once things settle down you will know what is ok and what is not.

Suse - wow, I don't know anyone that uses cloth nappies. I admit, I would have given them a go but my (lame) excuse is that we have such a tiny place, and our laundry is in our bathroom, that I worry it would stink the house out. We also have a tiny court yard, and don't even have a clothes line! (I know, our carbon footprint must be the size of Perth...). I will be investing in one of those wall ones very soon, but still don't think I could do the cloth thing.

Hey TwinSister! Welcome. Sounds like things are going ok, just as soon as you get back on track with the 7 hour nights. My lil fella is teething also - I got mine at 4 months so I am sure he is maybe a few months away. That could be throwing your little man off as well. BFing is bloody hard and I ignorantly thought that the hard part was the first week. Things have settled down for us heaps more now, but I still get lumps and worry about mastitis (I had that when DS was 5 weeks old). BBs get really sore and sometimes they are overflowing with milk and other times it seems like they are empty! I admire your determination, and don't want to put my foot in it or anything, but formula is always an option - it is not THAT bad for them, and sometimes the benefits (eg no more sore boobs, etc) can far outweigh the cost. Just a thought anyway - I know everything is pro-boob and that is really great, but it is just not for everybody...I am certainly not one to judge another woman's choices.

Hoody - I guess there isn't much to suggest - her asthma might be something you are stuck with! I only had one thought, perhaps pull up the carpet anyway and paint the floor and put a rug down. I guess if you are sure the carpet is a problem, otherwise you could just be wasting good carpet. You could always keep it rolled up in the shed and if her asthma doesn't improve you could put it back down again? At least it would be cooler in summer Hopefully it will be something she grows out of, fingers crossed hun.

Well, bubs is sleeping at the moment so I have some house stuff I gotta do...

Seeya's soon

[suse]

Hi Twin Sister!

Welcome! To answer your question about MCN - Modern Cloth Nappies. They are shaped like disposables, but made of cloth. There are lots of different types - fitted (which need a cover), pockets (which don't need a cover but need to be stuffed with an insert - they dry really quickly), and All In Ones, (which are like the name suggests - they are really convenient and easy but take longer to dry). There are also sized nappies, and one-size-fits-most which go from approximately birth to toilet-training - depending on how small/large your bub is! The sized nappies are usually trimmer, but don't last the full time that your bub will be in nappies. A lot of people use flats and pre-folds on newborns, then switch to fitteds etc when they are a bit bigger and using less nappies.

There are also lots of different fabrics used - synthetics are PUL (polyurethane laminate) for waterproof covers, fleece for covers (heavy weight Maldon Mills polar fleece like Windpro - it's very breathable), microfleece for stay dry liners, and microfibre for inserts. Natural fibres are cotton, bamboo (very, very absorbent), hemp for inserts, and wool for covers. Wool is fantastic as a cover because it is breathable. If you check out the cloth nappies section there is a thread on Cloth for Beginners, and there is also the General CLoth Nappies thread - come and join us, the people with a lot more experience than I would be more than happy to answer questions.

ETA: fitted nappies with a PUL cover that has leg gussets are great for poo blowouts because there's two layers of elastic, so if poo makes it past one layer, there's the second layer to catch it! I've only once had a tiny bit of escaping poo, and that was in a pocket nappy on a 3day monster poo which happened whilst feeding. MCN are great!!!

Good luck!!

[Hoody]

Hi Twinsister, Welcome Welcome and Welcome. I Have been following your Bfing story in one of your threads and you have done an amazing job to get this far Bfing certainly isnt as easy and smooth sailing as we'd like it to be sometimes is it? Although Molly has had no issues with my DD1 it was a nightmare so i do have an idea of what you have been going through however i gave up with dd1 at 7 wks and lived with the guilt and still do. However its made me all the more determined to feed Molly for longer. I cant comment on the nappies as i use disposables but i use huggies and have only had one or 2 blowouts iykwim.
I am assuming you are a twin due to your user name (correct me if i am wrong) and thought i'd share that i am too! Did you ever wonder if you would carry twins? I was scared to death of it esp 2nd time around as one of my other sister has twins and they are all throughout our family.

Everyone else- how are you all going??

We had a good night last night and today has been very nice too although Molly did scream for an hour plus this morning but thats becoming normal in our house. DD1 is much better, her asthma has settled down heaps so i think she is on the mend. She started daycare today for her one day a week! I was a little sad but thoroughly enjoying spending some one on one time with Molly and i even managed to do a food shop that only took me 45mins- yay.

[suse]

Dragonbub, cloth is actually a lot easier than most people think! Not trying to convert you or anything but I was quite surprised - I expected it to be a lot of extra work but it's not! (And I'm pretty darn lazy, LOL!) We're in a flat too, admittedly we have a courtyard but have to dry inside because of the humidity most of the time. I just bung 'em on a clotheshorse and it's a load every two-three days. And the nappy bucket doesn't smell at all - unless my DP doesn't put the lid on properly. We just rinse off the poo into the toilet with a little squirt, and they go straight into the bucket.

Hoody - I hope Mia's asthma continues to get better - it's a horrible feeling.

[Dragonbub]

Thanks Suse! I might have a think about it - especially for around the house. Going out might be tricky, but it would be good just round the house...

Have a great week,

[Hoody]

Well my good morning yesterday went pear shaped by the arvo and molly screamed for about 4hrs but was awake from 1-8. I went to the chemist and got her some infacol and have started using to see if it helps with her wind. However she then slept from 11-7 so 8 hours but i'm sure she was just so worn out iykwim. So far today she has been good but the afternoons seem to be our worst we we will see whats in store when we get there.
DD1 is still off but doing ok thank goodness mind you the monkey wont go to sleep and is crying so i best go get her.

[Willow]

Hoody - I'm sorry to hear Molly is still having these periods where she's quite distressed. Have you thought about taking her to see a paed? Hopefully the infacol will help!

[Hoody]

I am beside myself

I had Molly weighed today by my MCHN and in the last 4 weeks not only has she not gained any thing she has lost 48g. At 8 wks she was 4.050kg and today she was 4.002. I am so scared the MCHN was talking about failure to thrive. I have to take the fenugreed daily and take her in next week again and if no improvement investigations will start. Everyone around me is telling me this is why she is unsettled however after starting with the infacol last night today she has been a star. I am been told left right and centre to FF her. I just dont know what to do. I really want to continue to BF and yet feel like i am failing her and its my fault that her weight gain is so minimal. I blame myself for not weighing her in the last 4 weeks. DH thinks i am overreacting and has told me its one weigh in and not to stress. I wouldnt stress if it was only a week with no gain but for weeks no gain with a loss is scaring the ***** out of me.

[suse]

Hoody - you poor darling, of course you are beside yourself, but IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT!!!! I can understand how scared you must be, but don't blame yourself over this. It's quite possible that you are right, that the infacol has worked a treat and that her unsettledness is unrelated to the lack of weight gain. But it is so hard to tell why they are unsettled - if all of the signs were pointing to wind then you had no way of knowing that she wasn't gaining weight until she was weighed. Hindsight is a wonderful thing, but don't kick yourself because you weren't to know.

Have you posted in the breast-feeding support section? Barb would probably have some excellent advice for you specifically - but what I was told when Euan wasn't gaining enough weight at the start was to feed, feed, and feed some more. Offer the boob at every opportunity - if you can, spend two days in bed with Molly while DH looks after Mia, and just feed her till she's full up to pussy's bow. If she'll take it, use Molly to build up your supply rather than expressing, because a baby will drain the breast much more efficiently than expressing will. If you really want to BF perhaps give the ABA a call for advice, or Barb might be able to recommend an LC in your area (it might be really helpful if you can see one). It's really hard when everybody is telling you FF, rather than supporting you and helping you to get BFing on track again, when you are already feeling cr*p about Molly not gaining weight.

ETA: Just saw your other thread in the BF section. FF is not going to be the end of the world, but comp feeding won't help to build up your supply unless you express as well, it's a vicious cycle. If your MCHN has given you a week before wanting to check Molly's weight again, then things aren't so dire that you can't take a couple of days to get your supply up. Spend a couple of days feeding her as often as possible - (I've heard Barb use the phrase 'whenever she looks at you sideways' which I loved!) maybe Molly doesn't realise that she's not as full as she could be, so she's demand feeding, but not as demanding as she could be, iykwim. At this age comp feeding might not cause her to reject the breast, but the one thing it won't do is build your supply.

Hang in there hon, and get some good advice and support on helping you to stick with BFing if that's what you want to do. You aren't failing Molly at all, you are doing your best for her!!!

[Willow]

Awww Hoody, I'm so sorry hun, I know how you must be feeling because I'd feel exactly the same.

Suse has pretty much said it all, wonderful advice. If you don't want to give up hun, then don't!! But just make sure you get all the help and support you can. Wait a week and see how her weight is then. Her weight gain would be starting to slow down about now anyway I would imagine? Just feed, feed, feed!

[Twin Sister]

Suse - thanks so much for your thourough reply on cloth diapers. I really want to give them a go but our first experience was terrible (every one i tried leaked everywhere). I'm hoping once he grows a bit more the diaoers will hold better.

Hoody - I'm so sorry to hear you're having troubles with BF as well. My prob is different from yours but I can still completely sympathize. It's awful to want to BF so badly but have it go so badly. Hang in there, 48g isn't that much and maybe now that she's settled she'll start gaining more. I had a friend whose baby was crying so much it was burning too many calories up and she was losing too. Once they got the crying sorted out she started gainig beautifully.

Dragonbub - It's funny cuz I know FF isn't the end of the world but I feel like I'm letting DS down somehow if I give up on the BF. I've tasted both BM and formula and blech formula is so yucky, though DS didn't seem to mind when I gave it to him. My DH is very pro BF and won't let me give up which helps keep me going too.

[Hoody]

Well not much change here! Molly is now refusing the breast. I think it is because my stress levels have gone through the roof. I am expressing in between feed but so far have only managed 10mls i am trying to feed more often but as i said she is refusing. I am hoping to see an LC and get back on track i'm not ready to admit defeat yet.

[suse]

Good on you Hoody - you poor thing though - Molly now refusing the breast - and right when you want her to feed more! I've been thinking about you all day and hoping that things were a bit brighter, but it seems not. Many hugs being sent your way until they do improve - with your positive attitude though things can only get better. Molly is very lucky to have such a fighter for a mum!

[Willow]

Hoody - I've been there too with DD. We were having problems, I was trying to force her to feed more and then she started refusing the breast. We STILL got it sorted out with the help of a LC and I fed her till 16 months - don't give up yet, but get some help asap!

[Hoody]

My MCHN phoned today to see how i was getting on and i ended up in tears! She suggested i go and see her so i did. I told her i was going to see an LC and she told me that she is actually one (i knew she was very pro BFing but did not know this) We weighed Molly and she has lost weight since Wed so not good news. I am pumping 1 1/2 -2 hrly and still offering the breast as much as possible, When pumping i am lucky to get 10-20mls in total from both sides. She suggested i go to my GP and start on some Motilium so i have also done that. My GP was very for FF and told me too much pressure is put on BFing and i should switch over so i retorted that too much pressure is put on FFing and that i wanted to BF and wasnt going to formular feed. I Have another app with my MCHN on Mon day to follow up and re weigh Molly. One good thing that came out of my meeting with her today is that i have not attachment issues etc Molly is just frustrated at lack of milk so refuses breast after a suck or 2. I will be setting the alarm to pump through the night. I am determined to get back on track.

Thankyou all for your support i feel its the only place i have it apart from my MCHN everyone else around me is telling me to FF. (i did buy some just incase but dont think i will use it, i just did it to keep everyone off my back )

I am very stressed out but now i am getting help i think i will relax a little more.

[Hoody]

Yay today she is taking the breast she still has only had 6 feeds in the last 24hours though . If i try to feed her when she isnt demanding it she refuses it full stop and its upsetting for us both. We have been in and out all day so expressing 2hrly has been very hard. I have done it every chance i've had though (prob every 3-4 hrs) and am hoping its enough to get us on track. I am scared about weighing her but hopefully it will be good news. I have given her 100mls of formula in total split into 3 bottles as top ups and all her other top ups have been EBM but if i am lucky i am able to express 30-40 mls. I had to use the formula as she was very unsettled after a couple of feeds from me and would not go back on the breast and expressing was resulting in nothing. She has still been quite unsettled so i guess only time will tell if my supply is the reason behind this. Well we are hanging in there! I'm hoping tonight she will take the breast with ease with no refusal. Wish me luck

Anyway enough about me how are all of you doing?

[Dragonbub]

Hey Hoody - sorry to hear about your feeding issues. Failure to Thrive is not something any parent wants to hear, no wonder you are stressed! This is only going to put more pressure on you right when you need to be relaxed. Glad to hear your MCHN is really helping, it pays to have as many allies as you can. Good on you for telling your GP where to go - it is so easy for them to just take the easy option out. I am totally in the school of thought that says "whatever is BEST for baby" and sometimes that actually is formula feeding. But not until you are comletely satisfied that this is the BEST option for you and your bub. You are doing marvellously to hang in there and trying all the options. You have definitely NOT failed because you are trying your best.

That goes for you too Twinsister - I think you only fail if you give up all together and just give them cows milk! BF is best, but FF is not too far behind, and lets face it, in the "olden days" before formula, there was always a lady in the village who was lactating and bubs would get the milk from her (celebrities still use wet nurses), so it is nowhere near as "natural" as they say it should be.

Suse - thanks for your comments re my birth story

Twinsister - I tried looking up your birth story but couldn't find it?

As for us - DS still has bad days, but it just seems we are constantly adjusting to these changes. He stays up much longer now (2.5 hours) before getting grumpy, but then will only sleep for an hour before waking up and being a bit grumpy again. I think he is getting over-tired and I should put him down after 2 hours max. He is now waking at 5 am in the morning for a feed and will stay up for an hour before falling asleep again with me in the bed. I have tried re-introducing a dream-feed, but he is so sound asleep that he is just not interested. I will persevere though because while I didn't mind getting up at 6.30 with him (DH gets up for work then anyway) I certainly don't want to be getting up at 5! AND once daylight savings finishes, it will be 4 in the morning

Anyhoo, all in all things are good. Have a great weekend!

PS I have posted my birth story if anyone is interested.

[Dragonbub]

We had our first swim class yesterday! DH came too which was great cos other dads were there. DS and DH looked so cute together, and Caden was quite content just floating around. It was no where near as scary as I thought it would be cos he is quite bouyant! (sp?). He had a great big 3 hour sleep afterwards and was a little bit grumpy but fairly well-behaved all night when we went out for dinner.

I think we have passed the 3 month hump and things are heaps better. I am now the one saying "things will get better" but thanks to both Hoody and Willow who kept drumming it into me - I finally believe you!

Have a good week guys - especially Hoody, I am thinking of you *hugs*