melissa the same thing happened to me when i was 18.the phone rang and a man on the other end said hi is this nicole,i said yes,he said i dont really know how to tell you this but i am your father,i was speachless as i actually thought it was a cruel joke.i was told from a very young age that my dad had died when i was 1.i had alwys wondered about him but never ever though i would see him or even see a photo of him.i said to the voice on the other end,no its not he isnt alive who is this,i was very confused,he said his name HIENZ KELLING as soon as he said his name i almost passed out because i couldnt think of anyone who would know that information.i was convinced and spoke cheerfully to him and agreed to meet him at flinders street station later that week,as you can imagine there were many thoughts and questions going through my mind in that time.when i met him i was happy and uncomfortable,there was alot i wanted to know.
as it turned out he was a lovely man but his wife was far to difficult to get along with.i lived with them for about 6 months and it was a real strain.after i moved out we stayed in contact and visited each other and then it fizzled out,he now has throat cancer and is dying,they told him when i was 5 months pregnant with chantelle that he had 8 weeks to live and as far as i know he is still alive and ok.i dont regret meeting him at all as i have closure on all the questions i had and i was able to meet the man that made me.there is no contact now but that suits me.
i say go for it,there is nothing to lose and only something to gain even if it is just some answers you have been waiting for,just be very careful that you dont let him get too involved with you and your family until you are certain that you can trust him considering his history,and if you find at some stage down the track that you are not comfortable with the relaitionship then act quickly and close it off before it gets too hard.if he turns out to be a great guy it willbe wonderful for benjamin and your future children to have a poppy in there lives.
nikki