DF has been constantly putting the hard word on me lately, i get that its been like 12 weeks but FFS im so over it! im just not ready to do it yet.
i stopped bleeding FINALLY last week, but have had spotting on and off since then and in my head, if im still bleeding, then obviously things arent quite ready yet.
im over the need for my body, ive been breastfeeding a baby round the clock for the last 9 weeks (dont get me wrong i love it! but at the same time, my body is needed by someone other than myself ITMS?) before that i was carrying her in my belly for 37 weeks and before that it was only 3 and bit months between jacks birth and addisons conception, so in other words, 2 yrs of someone other than myself needing my body. and if we want to count it, i bf Iz for 6 months and as soon as i stopped i was pregnant again, so virtually 3.5 yrs of my body not being my own, which is fine, when we choose to have kids, we choose to sacrifice our bodies.
i've been waiting until after he's in bed before i go in (like an hr or 2) and the last few nights ive taken Addison into bed with me just so he doesnt try anything on. Last night the 3 of us were having nice cuddles for a while and then the wandering hand started, i moved my body in a way to indicate that i wasnt interested but he kept going and i asked him to stop, which he did, but then he blew up at me because apparently i was stringing him on....um no. I dont deal with pre arranged sex, i just cant do it, i dont know why, the pressure of knowing i have to 'preform' makes me shut down and definetly doesnt get me in the mood!
its not that i dont want to have sex with him, just not yet.
He's been so great since he started his new job, he;s the happiest he's been in yrs and is helping heaps with the kids and the house work, i get that he NEEDS to have sex, every healthy relationship does but atm, im just not there.
Sorry to unload that on you ladies, just needed to get it out before i belt him with a frying pan.
In A news, nothing major to report, decent night out of my sprout, i looovoe snuggling in bed with her, she's so fnny when she sleeps
Skybie, sorry things are strained between you and hubby. I understand because DH definitely has a higher sex drive than I do. Luckily since having Arlia he hasn't requested anything more than a "helping hand". I don't even know how to manage anything more these days. Arlia is co-sleeping in our room and the majority of nights we have his two stepsons here because they live with us, so it's not like we can retreat to the lounge room for some action because even after bed time someone might get up and wander in. I wonder how others make this work....?
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