I'm petrified of death. The whole nothingness scares me so bad if I start thinking about it I have to stop or I will end up in a massive anxiety attack.

I worry about my girls as their dad is a drop kick and pray he would let me parents have custody so thy are raised in a stable and loving environment as I'm sure he would think I had died to inconvenience him.
And I worry that he won't let M still be a part of the girls lives.

I have life Insurance though and it's set up to go to M so my ex can't get his hands on anything and my will states that M will have the money in trust for the girls and will pay for half certain things when he is given the bill for. So my girls will be looked after by a trust fund that will be available for part schooling costs (their dad will still have to be some what financially responsible)
But i don't want to have ex the have access to the money when he feels like it and waste it like I know he would.


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